it’s going to be awkward the next time Jenna Jameson and Meryl Streep do a movie together

Republican Senator Rand Paul said that this week he will introduce a GOP replacement plan for Obamacare. The new comprehensive health initiative will be called “Don’t Get Sick.” –Conan O’Brien

CNN is reporting that the Russians have disgusting and damaging information about Donald Trump. Apparently, the Russian report on Trump contains “everything we already know.” –Conan O’Brien

On Twitter, porn actress Jenna Jameson bashed Meryl Streep for her Golden Globe speech. Wow, it’s going to be awkward the next time Jameson and Streep do a movie together. –Conan O’Brien

A man has finally been arrested for changing the famous Hollywood sign to read “Hollyweed.” In other words, we’re punishing the first stoner in the world to actually show some initiative. –Conan O’Brien