This is like if a mental patient escaped the hospital and wandered into an air traffic control tower (a long, stress-free life)

We have been waiting for disgraced congressman George Santos to be voted out of Congress all week and as of Thursday evening, we are still waiting. Why this has taken so long, I have no idea. This is like if a mental patient escaped the hospital and wandered into an air traffic control tower and then a year later he was still up there landing planes. —Jimmy Kimmel

Henry Kissinger’s death at 100 just goes to show you that if you have zero morals, you’ll lead a long, stress-free life. He committed massacres and lived to be 100, while the rest of us over here are dying at 47 because we can’t stop stressing about the time we waved to a person who was actually waving to someone behind us. —Michelle Wolf, The Daily Show

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 

A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”