I am single/Guinness will have it all by Monday/how to perform surgery

Vladimir Putin announced he’s running for reelection as president of Russia. Putin’s campaign slogan is “I Made America Great Again.” –Conan O’Brien

Ireland will be collecting $15 billion from Apple in a settlement over back taxes. Ireland will receive the money on Friday, and Guinness will have it all by Monday. –Conan O’Brien

A New York woman is suing her surgeon claiming he was on his cell phone during her operation. In response, the doctor said, “For your information, I was Googling ‘how to perform surgery.’” –Conan O’Brien

Amazon is now making it possible to create a shopping profile for your cat. Yeah, all you have to do is go to Amazon and type in “I am single.” –Conan O’Brien

      

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #JohnHulse #collectedpoems #Bernie2020 #repealreplacerepublicans