Saturday, December 30, 2017

Hey Girl, I Hear You Like Revolutions (lovingly crafted from the bones of an enemy)

"We talked a little bit last night about Vice President 'Chinny,' how he is in fact not a member of the executive branch, that he is part VP, part legislator, part she-wolf. 

How else do you explain his eight teats. According to the Washington Post, which of the following safety precautions does the VP have in his office? 

Is it A) a motion sensing alarm, B) a rock shaped hide-a-key lovingly crafted from the bones of an enemy, or C) a man-sized safe? 

The answer, according to the Washington Post, Dick Cheney keeps several man-sized safes in his office for storing what his aides call 'work-day business.' 

Now, unless 'work-day business' includes needing some place large enough to stuff a body, why the vice president needs a man-sized safe is unclear. 

A document-sized safe, yes, I could understand that, unless of course he says, 'Hey Johnson, put the papers in the safe -- oh, and stay in there with them.'" --Jon Stewart

A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster.
Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s
Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.

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