Has anyone ever told you how your balance of teeth is pleasing to the eye? (Is this seat taken?)

According to a new study, the best-received smiles are those that have a pleasing balance of teeth, which is incidentally the worst-received compliment. “Has anyone ever told you how your balance of teeth is pleasing to the eye? Is this seat taken?” –Seth Meyers

A company in New York City has opened what some are calling a nonalcoholic cocktail bar that creates drinks using lemons and herbal ingredients instead of alcohol. And this is cool — they’re using empty chairs instead of customers. –Seth Meyers

"As you all know, President Bush was not at the Republican convention due to a disaster: his presidency." --Jay Leno

"Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson said that the proposed bailout plan will cost taxpayers $700 billion. To give you an idea how much money that is, I can't give you an idea of how much money that is." --Seth Meyers



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