"China's state media has announced that it’s 'Cleaning the Web' Campaign has successfully shut down 110 porn websites. That's like New York City announcing that their 'Cleaning the Subway' campaign has successfully exterminated one rat." –Seth Meyers
"It's become clear to me that I've won television. You see, Jon, almost nine years ago I promised to change the world and together, I did it." –Stephen Colbert, stopping by The Daily Show to announce, in character, the real reason that he is ending his show
"Maybe ride the rails, live boxcar to boxcar, learn how to whip up a hearty stew from peanut shells and a stolen chicken." –Stephen Colbert on his plans after leaving television
"The Christian Science Monitor is claiming 'Hillary Clinton will be a tad less interested in running for president now that she's about to be a grandmother.' And if you put a grain of sand in your pocket there's a tad less sand on the beach." –Seth Meyers
"Stephen Colbert is here, ladies and gentlemen. He's here. He just dropped by to sign the lease." –David Letterman
"I don't know if you've heard this, but Stephen Colbert will be taking over the show sometime next year – pending the physical." –David Letterman
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
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