Donations

Wednesday, June 3, 2020

I heard Bathsheba had a pretty sweet can (so it’s certainly not mine)


It’s The Bible, not an auction paddle. Looks like a camp counselor going through lost and found at the end of the summer. [as Trump] Is this anybody’s book? No pictures in it, so it’s certainly not mine.’” —Seth Meyers

[as Trump] I don’t have a Bible. My Bible, as always, is Hustler magazine. This thing is the most boring magazine I’ve ever seen. It doesn’t even have a centerfold, which is too bad because I heard Bathsheba had a pretty sweet can.” —Stephen Colbert

“Trump only has two modes: menacing sociopath or limp french fry that’s been sitting in the bottom of the bag soaking up all the oil, and on Monday, Trump cycled through both of them, threatening to unleash the military on American protesters at home on one hand and listlessly reading off a teleprompter like he just finished a Thanksgiving meal of turkey with Sudafed stuffing on the other.” —Seth Meyers

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

No comments:

Post a Comment