Afghanistan - The Path Forward (Goreggernaut/Stop Thinking?/Nobel War Prize)

"They awarded the peace prize to Al Gore. This is the latest in a series of awards Al Gore's won and I haven't -- an Emmy, an Oscar, he even won his matchup on kittenwar.com. Now, some people see Gore's latest honor as a sign that he should run for president. I see it as tonight's 'Word.' 

Enviro-medal disaster. 

Al Gore is rapidly depleting one of the earth's most precious resources -- awards 

[on screen: Melting Prize Caps]. 

The man is plowing through our prizescape like an unstoppable bulldozer of acclaim. Every day another precious, irreplaceable acre of trophies disappears into his gaping maw, never to be seen again 

[on screen: 'Daddy, What Were The Latin Grammys?']. 

At his current rate of accolade consumption, there will be nothing left for our grandchildren to win 

[on screen: Except 'Most Submerged']. 

If we care about the future of our Golden Globe, we must slow down the Gore juggernaut, or Goreggernaut. The only way to do that is to stop thinking he's so great. And that only way to do that is to stop thinking President Bush is so terrible 

[on screen: Stop Thinking?]. 

Gore's not the only one who deserves an award. Don't our children deserve a few? And doesn't our president deserve just one? 

[on screen: Nobel War Prize]. 

And that's 'The Word.'" 

--Stephen Colbert