She can't even commit to being uncommitted

"Last night the Democrats beat Republicans 22-0 in the Congressional Baseball Game. Yeah, the Republicans were so bad at baseball, that today they're starting to rethink immigration." –Jimmy Fallon



"Ever since the government's spying scandal was exposed, sales of the novel '1984' have jumped 6,000 percent on Amazon. Yeah, '1984' shows how scary it would be if society tracked everything you do. And if you want to read it, just buy it on a website that tracks everything you do." –Jimmy Fallon 

"Sarah Palin has been hired back by Fox News, and she only left five months ago. She has now effectively quit quitting. She can't even commit to being uncommitted." –John Oliver