https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html
“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic.
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”
Thursday, June 30, 2022
Jordan Chariton: The "Biden is FDR" SCAM - with New Deal Historian Harvey J. Kaye
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
Write a question on a piece of paper, throw it out the window and hope for the best? (The reality I accept)
June 2022
“There is chilling fallout from the supreme court’s decision to overturn Roe v Wade last week. Ever since the supreme court decided that having a child is a sacred choice between a woman and her state legislature, abortion laws have been chaos. Some states have banned abortions, others have protected it, and others have banned it only to have their courts overturn those bans until they re-ban it. So right now, women’s reproductive rights are as unpredictable as the McRib – it’s here, it’s gone, it’s here, it’s gone, it’s back again!” —Trevor Noah
“In order to enforce bans in certain states, aggressive prosecutors could use data from period tracking apps or search history to prove that women have sought an abortion. Which, first of all, is a very unhealthy practice in a relationship. You don’t search through anyone’s phone, OK? It destroys trust. Don’t do it. And also, what a shit world for women to be living in.” —Trevor Noah
“You need to use your phone for everything, especially period tracking or where you’re going to find an abortion clinic. Like how are you going to search for abortion pills without Google? Are you just going to write a question on a piece of paper, throw it out the window and hope for the best?” —Trevor Noah
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
His biggest weakness? Name recognition. (and I'm not even sure of that)
June 2022
“Well, guys, it’s been a tough couple of days for the Giuliani family. First, Rudy Giuliani — I don’t know if you heard this — he claimed that he was assaulted at a grocery store, but security footage showed that it was more of a pat on his back. And then, last night, Rudy’s son Andrew Giuliani lost the Republican primary for New York governor. Yeah. His biggest weakness? Name recognition.” —Jimmy Fallon
“It was a tough night for Andrew. He gave his dad a big hug, and then Rudy accused him of assault.” —Jimmy Fallon
“Andrew, honey, I hope you know that you lost, not because of your swollen bee sting head, or because you’ve got a smile like a jack-o’-lantern, or because you have zero qualifications. You lost because your last name is now toxic, because your dad had one week after 9/11 when he was considered a hero, but then he blew it when he went [expletive] nuts. There are so many questions left unanswered. Would Andrew have lost if his dad didn’t try to overthrow democracy from a landscaping store, or sweat gravy during a press conference? We’ll never know.” —Chelsea Handler
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
a movie that had way more nudity than they were expecting (Definition of Sin)
June 2022
“Cassidy Hutchinson’s testimony, the former Trump White House aide’s statements on Tuesday were so powerful that Fox News hosts appeared speechless on air, specifically a long, awkward pause during a broadcast with Bret Baier, Sandra Smith and John Roberts. They couldn’t settle on a coherent narrative the way they usually do. They just cycled through a bunch of different lines, from screaming about media bias to claiming everyone knows Trump gets angry to dismissing Hutchinson as a low-level staffer who supposedly had ulterior motives. Oof. That’s like when you get in the car with your parents after they took you to a movie that had way more nudity than they were expecting.” —Seth Meyers
“I also like how they all act like the question was for the other person: ‘John, why don’t you go ahead?’ [imitating Fox News hosts] ‘I’m sorry, are you talking to me John or the cameraman John?’ ‘Sandra, do you want to take this one?’ ‘Oh, sorry, I couldn’t hear you. Why don’t you go ahead, Bret?’ ‘No, no, no, no, no, no. Ladies first.’” —Seth Meyers
“So on the one hand, as an unprecedented constitutional crisis was unfolding, there were people like Cassidy Hutchinson who were at least paying attention and asking questions. And then on the other hand, there were guys like Mark Meadows, who was just totally zonked and pretending nothing was happening. Dude was just scrolling on his phone, ignoring pleas for help like a lifeguard at a swimming pool who has one guess left in Wordle.” —Seth Meyers
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
Jimmy Dore: Trump Never “Lunged” For Steering Wheel Say Secret Service
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
Jimmy Dore: Kamala Harris Stunningly Inept Response To Roe v Wade Question
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
The Cramps - weekend on mars
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
The Jacks, Keikichi Usui, B. Schnare - omae ni muchu sa (instrumental)
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
Ana Kasparian’s Jimmy Dore Impression Is Amazing!
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
Jimmy Dore with Mike MacRae: Vince Vaughn Freaks Out Over New Cigarette Regulations
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
Jeff Beck - Hammerhead
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
Jaco Pastorius - Stumble (Live in Italy)
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
The Meters - Ease Back
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
Jimmy Dore: The Dumbest Takes On Roe v Wade Compilation
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
BOBBY POWELL "Your good, good loving"
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
The Meters "Cardova"
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
MLB The Show: S14 Arizona Diamondbacks (G 72-80)
https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html
“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic.
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”
Wednesday, June 29, 2022
Well, that's the price you pay for hiring Chris Christie (Yes, We Can, But We Won't)
Yesterday, White House officials said Russia targeted election systems in 21 states last year. Trump was furious. He said, “I paid for all 50.” –Jimmy Fallon
Trump’s campaign isn't doing so well financially. A recent report said his campaign even spent over $100,000 for meals just last month. Trump was like, "Well, that's the price you pay for hiring Chris Christie." –Jimmy Fallon
Congrats to Chelsea Clinton, who welcomed her second child over the weekend. After the birth, Bill brought flowers, while Hillary brought a focus group to help name the baby. –Jimmy Fallon
"In his speech yesterday, former President George W. Bush attacked President Obama's policies on anti-terrorism, healthcare, and the economy. Then Bush spent the next 20 minutes trying to kill a fly." --Jimmy Fallon
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
To give you an idea of how strict it is, you get 20 years just for saying the phrase 'penal code.' (Where are the Somali pirates when you need them?)
"A republican congressman actually apologized to BP's CEO for the way the company has been treated. How stupid are you when the CEO of BP is in the room and people think you're the moron?" –Jay Leno
"A new study has found that the majority of wealthy people in China want to move to other countries and the government is trying to find ways to keep them. If only they could build a big wall." –Jay Leno
"Tony Hayward on a yacht. Where are the Somali pirates when you need them?" –Jay Leno
"Iran's parliament has voted in favor of a bill that would give the death penalty to people convicted of making pornography. Under Iran's penal code, that's one of the worst criminal offenses they have. To give you an idea of how strict it is, you get 20 years just for saying the phrase 'penal code.'" --Jay Leno
"Newt Gingrich has a new campaign slogan: 'Now hiring!' Sixteen of Gingrich's top staff quit last week, and today, two of his top fundraisers quit. He's not even president and he's already raising the unemployment rate." –Jay Leno
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
unless he got the marriage counselor pregnant, I don't think that's true (the most popular class at Trump University)
Former California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger said this week that marriage counseling is the biggest mistake he's ever made. Though unless he got the marriage counselor pregnant, I don't think that's true. --Seth Meyers
President Trump today accused Democrats of wanting "unlimited crime." Coincidently, Unlimited Crime was also the most popular class at Trump University. --Seth Meyers
Mitt Romney won last night’s Utah Republican Senate primary. Romney celebrated by going to a victory party and turning the music down. --Seth Meyers
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
And when I say "talk," I mean loud, angry, incomprehensible talk (Quick tip - if they stab you . . . fake monk)
Tourists visiting New York City are being warned about "fake monks" on the street who wear orange robes and demand money. Quick tip - if they stab you . . . fake monk. –Conan O’Brien
"Over the weekend Pope Francis implied that the Mafia should be excommunicated. In a related story, the Pope is missing. And nobody saw nothin'." –Conan O'Brien
Because of England’s Brexit vote, there’s now talk in Scotland and Northern Ireland about leaving the UK. And when I say "talk," I mean loud, angry, incomprehensible talk. –Conan O’Brien
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
Something tells me this isn’t the first time Rudy has exaggerated the size of something (And just like nails, he’s always hammered)
June 2022
“Folks, speaking of January 6th plotters, this weekend Rudy Giuliani was assaulted by a grocery store worker on Staten Island. Before I go any further, before I say anything else, let me say that Rudy Giuliani is fine, other than the fact that he remains Rudy Giuliani.” —Stephen Colbert
“Something tells me this isn’t the first time Rudy has exaggerated the size of something.” —Chelsea Handler
“You think that’s what being shot feels like? No wonder you’re not concerned about guns. That wasn’t a slap. That was a Little League coach saying, ‘You’ll get ’em next time.’” —Seth Meyers
“After the video evidence came out, the D.A. released the assailant, who also had the charges against him reduced. They’ve gone from felony assault down to back-tap with intent to ‘Hey!’” —Stephen Colbert
“Rudy remains undaunted. His son, Andrew, and his load-bearing teeth say we don’t have to worry about Rudy because he’s ‘tough as nails.’ And just like nails, he’s always hammered.” —Stephen Colbert
“Tonight I join the millions of Americans who are outraged over the supreme court’s decision to overturn Roe v Wade, which left the right to bodily autonomy incinerated by a corrupt gang of unaccountable, rightwing theocrats who definitely think the Scarlet Letter was a comedy.” —Seth Meyers
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
all I know is I’m not the one being stabbed, this sounds like a you problem (Calling people bootlickers since 1776)
June 2022
It has been the most shocking hearing yet from the January 6th committee, thanks to Cassidy Hutchinson, a former top aide to Donald Trump’s last White House chief of staff, Mark Meadows. According to Hutchinson, Meadows was aware of the rally’s intentions ahead of time, and told her ‘things might get real, real bad on January 6th.’ So, the president’s chief of staff knew there could be terrible consequences, and went ahead with it anyway?! This mob showed up to his rally ready for violence, but because of their weapons – guns, knives, spears tied to the top of flag poles, bear spray – they were being stopped at the magnetic security gates, thus lessening the size of Trump’s crowd. Hutchinson said she heard the ex-president shout, ‘I don’t care that they have weapons. They’re not here to hurt me, take the fucking [security gates] away. Let my people in. They can march to the Capitol from here.’ So he was cool with his mob being armed because he knew he wasn’t the one they wanted to attack. That’s like hearing, ‘Hello, 911, state your emergency … uh huh … well, all I know is I’m not the one being stabbed, this sounds like a you problem.’” —Stephen Colbert
“We’ve heard how the former president wanted to go with the marchers along to the Capitol for the attack – presumably to batter his way into the Senate chamber with a meatball sub, but Hutchinson told us today just how desperate he was to join his mob. Hutchinson told the committee that following the rally, Trump tried to grab the steering wheel from a Secret Service agent after he refused to drive him to the Capitol. That is insane, although it is going to make a great season premiere of Kleptocrats in Cars Seizing Power. Hutchinson also confirmed that Meadows sought a presidential pardon from Trump for his role in the riot. The president’s own chief of staff wanted a Get Out of Jail Free card. But he didn’t get it, so hopefully soon he will not pass Go, not collect $200, and go directly to jail.” —Stephen Colbert
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
Who the hell let him out of his car seat? (or I could steal a car from the Secret Service)
June 2022
“The latest January 6th hearings have been insane, after Cassidy Hutchinson, a Trump aide, testified that the former president hurled his lunch against the wall in anger, lunged at a Secret Service agent and attempted to grab the steering wheel of the presidential limousine so that he could join the rioters at the Capitol. I, too, was shocked to hear that Trump threw any of his food away.” —Trevor Noah
“Evidently, the former president breaks a lot of dishes, which is why his handlers make sure his meals are served only in bucket or edible bowl.” —Stephen Colbert
“I mean you’ve got to admit, though, fighting your own Secret Service agent is genius on Trump’s part — he’s hitting the one person who can’t hit back. Yeah, they can punch back but then they’ve got to jump in front of their own punch.” —Trevor Noah
“When grabbing the steering wheel didn’t work, he grabbed the car by the [expletive].” —Chelsea Handler
“Immediately the agents were like, ‘Who the hell let him out of his car seat?’” —Jimmy Fallon
“Not to victim blame, but this is on the Secret Service, all right? You had four years to Trump-proof that vehicle — you knew who you were dealing with. There should have been a toy steering wheel in the passenger seat the whole time. Just let him think he’s driving and go back to the West Wing anyway.” —Trevor Noah
“This whole thing shows you how lazy Trump is. The Capitol is like two miles away. Everyone else walked there. But Trump was like ‘I could walk there, I could walk … or I could steal a car from the Secret Service.’” —Trevor Noah
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
Kamala REVEALS Plan On Roe: NOTHING | Breaking Points
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
NHL: Toronto Maple Leafs vs Florida Panthers
https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html
“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic.
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”
Jimmy Dore: Obama & Biden Lied About Codifying Roe v Wade
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
Jimmy Dore: Uvalde Cops Harass Mother Who saved Her Kids
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
Tuesday, June 28, 2022
By the way, “supermodel times ten” is also his spray tan setting (Lord Love a Lefty)
Donald Trump thanked crowds in Phoenix for their support this weekend, saying, “I feel like a supermodel, except like times ten.” By the way, “supermodel times ten” is also his spray tan setting. –Seth Meyers
Burger King Russia has apologized for offering a lifetime supply of Whoppers to any Russian woman who could get pregnant with the child of a World Cup player. In related news, no matter what this guy says [picture of Burger King’s “The King” ad mascot], he does not play for Spain. --Seth Meyers
Yesterday House Speaker Paul Ryan referred to the Democratic-led sit-in for gun control as “nothing more than a publicity stunt.” He then added, “Now if you’ll excuse me, my party’s nominee has a WWE match to fight.” –Seth Meyers
A Canadian woman was arrested for having an open container of liquor while driving Toronto Mayor Rob Ford’s SUV. Although when Rob Ford’s in the car, anyone not smoking crack is legally considered a designated driver.--Seth Meyers
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
U.S. to intervene in China's War On Poverty on the side of poverty (it ends with him killing Obi-Wan Kenobi)
"This weekend, President Bush gave a speech honoring Abraham Lincoln's birthday. There was an awkward moment when Bush referred to Lincoln as 'the guy who invented the penny.'" --Conan O'Brien
Last night’s sit-in by Congressional Democrats was live-streamed and got over 3 million views. Which is why today, Congress got picked up for two seasons on Netflix. –Conan O’Brien
"Former Vice President Dick Cheney is in the news. Cheney has signed a publishing deal to write his memoirs. I don't want to spoil anything, but it ends with him killing Obi-Wan Kenobi.'" --Conan O'Brien
"Both the U.S. and German teams have very good goalies in the World Cup, so many are predicting a very low-scoring game tomorrow. So don't expect to see another one of those 1-0 blowouts." –Conan O'Brien
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
I’m not sure that he knows where babies come from (whether it’s a gun or a baby, you’re carrying something)
June 2022
“What the court appears to be doing now is mandating its own moral code. Of course, they might argue ‘No it didn’t – we specifically ended our opinion by saying we return the issue of abortion to the people’s elected representatives.’ Have you met the people’s elected representatives?! I have! Louis Gohmert is one of them. I’m not sure that he knows where babies come from.” —Stephen Colbert
“But even the fact that we got a leaked copy almost eight weeks ago did not emotionally prepare the country for last Friday’s seismic shift in the political landscape, as the decision eliminated, for the first time in history, an established constitutional right involving autonomy over one’s body. And having more personal rights is kinda America’s whole thing. We invented it. Americans having rights taken away is like KFC changing its slogan from ‘We Do Chicken Right’ to ‘There Is No Constitutional Right to Chicken’.” —Stephen Colbert
“So, reproductive rights in America lasted for less time than The Young and the Restless. Jack Abbott’s evil twin is going to be so shocked when he comes out of his fifth coma.” —Stephen Colbert
“Everyone is talking about the Supreme Court after they made some pretty major decisions over the last few days, and let me just sum it up for you: They basically said whether it’s a gun or a baby, you’re carrying something.” —Jimmy Fallon
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
Don’t you think you’re taking it a wee bit too far with the Jesus stuff? (Roses are Red, Violets are Blue)
June 2022
“People just want things done. No one cares about Kente cloth or singing on the Capitol steps and especially not poetry, all right? I feel like any moment now Chuck Schumer is going to throw on a fake pregnant belly, and just take a knee in the Capitol and be like ‘We are all pregnant now and we’re standing together.’” —Trevor Noah
“With Friday’s supreme court ruling overturning Roe v Wade, women in America just lost control of their own bodies. Which, I don’t care who you are, is a horrifying thing to be faced with. The 6-3 ruling overturning half a century of precedent was especially crazy, when you consider that countries like Mexico and Ireland are moving forward in the opposite direction. You do realize how weird that is, right? Ireland has had violent conflicts between Christians and other Christians, and even they are looking at America like, ‘Don’t you think you’re taking it a wee bit too far with the Jesus stuff?’” —Trevor Noah
“I know many people around the country feel infuriated, depressed and like there’s no hope. But there is, there really is. There are grassroots organizations already doing the work on the ground in need of donations and volunteers. And as for the Democrats in power, there is something you can actually do. I have even written a poem addressed to Democratic lawmakers: Roses are red / Violets are blue / The people voted, so how about doing your fucking job passing laws to codify contraception, marriage equality and all the other rights the supreme court has basically threatened to take away / And so are you.” —Trevor Noah
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
At this point I’d probably have more rights if my vagina was an AR-15 (1 in 6 American children live in poverty)
June 2022
“I will be here all week long, or at least until Republicans make it illegal for women to talk. Jimmy is off right now doing whatever the [expletive] he wants with his body.” —Chelsea Handler
“Remember like five days ago when Fox News told us the biggest threat facing America was drag queens? That was cute.” —Chelsea Handler
“At this point I’d probably have more rights if my vagina was an AR-15.” —Chelsea Handler
“And yet Republicans intend to press further, as the House minority leader, Kevin McCarthy, made clear on Friday: ‘We will continue to look wherever we can go to save as many lives as possible.’ Sure, just as long as that life doesn’t need baby formula, affordable healthcare, or a place to learn without getting shot.” —Chelsea Handler
“Not only has this decision further divided our country, most families now have two separate group texts going: one with relatives who support the rights of women and one with the relatives who live in Florida.” —Chelsea Handler
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
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