You do everything I say and I won’t feed you to a boa constrictor (melted crayons and marmalade)

The president didn't get a subpoena today, at least not from Robert Mueller. He did get a fresh new lawsuit filed against him. The New York attorney general filed suit against Donald Trump, Eric Trump, Ivanka Trump, and Donald Trump Jr. for persistently illegal conduct by the Trump Foundation, their charity organization. The suit alleges that the Trumps misused their nonprofit to pay business debts and campaign expenses, which is not allowed. The attorney general says Trump's kids were collecting money despite doing no discernible work for it — which, in fairness to them, that's what they do, that's their job. They collect money in exchange for being born. The board of directors for the charity hadn't even met in 19 years. Trump himself hadn't made a contribution to his own foundation, the Trump Foundation, in 10 years. Most foundations of this type are supported almost entirely by the person they're named after. It's important to remember, though, this foundation isn't the foundation he puts on his face every morning. That is made of melted crayons and marmalade. This is a different thing. --Jimmy Kimmel

Dennis Rodman is in the middle of what is planned to be a four-day trip in North Korea and he brought gifts on this trip for his BFF Kim Jong Un. He brought a variety of soaps wrapped in cellophane. He brought a mermaid jigsaw puzzle. Two nondescript number 91 jerseys. This is like a sad yard sale or terrible flea market. And Rodman brought two books, “Where’s Waldo?” and “The Art of the Deal.” I love that he brought Kim Jong Un “The Art of the Deal” — as if he needs help negotiating. Negotiating with Kim Jong Un goes like this: You do everything I say and I won’t feed you to a boa constrictor. –Jimmy Kimmel

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”