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Saturday, December 31, 2016

For the next war, I already have some darn good intelligence...honest.



"President Bush also said today that he is worried that Iraq will be overrun by religious fundamentalists. Hey, let me tell you something. If it's good enough for the Republican Party, it is good enough for Iraq." --Jay Leno

"The stock market bounced back today, up 117 points. See what happens when Bush leaves the country for a few days, things get better." --Jay Leno

"With all this talk of hope and change and idealism and getting the country back on track, it was a friend of mine, an old friend who -- he wanted to say something to you. Is he ready to say it? [on screen: Pres. Bush saying, 'Iran is a threat to world peace']. Boo! That's former president, what is that? Oh, he's still. Bush's warning to Iran was sort of a nice reminder for all of us here in the country that he's still the president. And to drive the point home, he's actually going overseas. The president has taken on an ambitious Middle East eight-day, six-country, 12-war visit. I assume he's going to the Middle East like kind of one of those post Katrina surveying of the damage kind of, did I do that?" --Jon Stewart


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