Monday, December 26, 2016

And they called Bill Clinton slick (just winded from torturing someone)

"Dick Cheney had another scare. He was taken to the hospital with shortness of breath. He was okay, he was just winded from torturing a detainee." --David Letterman

"Because of the Jack Abramoff and Duke Cunningham bribery scandals, Republicans in Congress are now putting together what they are calling a sweeping lobbying reform package. They think it's such a good idea that they're going to charge companies a million dollars to sponsor it." --Jay Leno

"This Jack Abramoff guy allegedly bribed congressmen on issues ranging from wireless phone service to internet gambling. This guy was really up to date on technology. In fact, before he was indicted, he had a deal going with the home shopping network for people to be able to buy a congressman online." --Jay Leno

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