"Evil Democrat
Empire? I got news for you, if we're going to do the Star Wars analogy, the
Democrats are, at best, Ewoks." --Jon Stewart, on a Republican spoof video
comparing Democrats to the evil Empire in Star Wars
"Good news from the
White House. President Bush last week had his annual physical and he passed. He
passed his annual physical. No word yet on the mental." --David Letterman
"This week senators
passed a limited ethics bill. It's something congress knows a lot about.
Limited ethics. Some of the new rules are pretty tough, like from now on, all
bribe money has to be in a clear plastic bag." --Jay Leno
"Senator Hillary
Clinton said she is in favor of building a wall between Mexico and the United
States. After hearing this, former President Bill Clinton said, 'She means a
metaphorical wall of silence and resentment. Trust me.'" --Conan O'Brien

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