they were probably too nervous to say something because I’m on TV (You know we never stopped loving you, baby)

March 2022

After the U.S. ban on Russian oil, gas prices hit a record high of $4.30 a gallon. Which is so expensive, that America, we might have to move back in with our ex. ‘Come on, Iraq. You know we never stopped loving you, baby.’ —Michael Che

Russia has responded to sanctions by banning the export of Russian-made cars. But a Russian-made car is just a drunk bear on roller skates. —Michael Che

A video has gone viral of a man urinating on a New York City Subway while other passengers appear not to care. But they were probably too nervous to say something because I’m on TV. —Michael Che

It was reported that Queen Elizabeth II has moved out of Buckingham Palace, and this is weird, in with John Mayer. —Colin Jost

A thief in Colorado broke into a truck and stole a box of human heads. Even more disturbing, it was an Arby’s truck. —Colin Jost

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/02/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”