What channel is CDC?

This Powerball drawing is tomorrow night. The pot is up to $1.5 billion — a record, almost triple the previous jackpot. To put that in perspective, $1.5 billion is almost half of Oprah. –Jimmy Kimmel

The 84-year-old media mogul Rupert Murdoch this week proposed to 59-year-old former model Jerry Hall. Hall said yes because she didn’t feel like standing in line for Powerball tickets. –Seth Meyers

In the lead-up to tonight’s State of the Union address, House Speaker Paul Ryan accused President Obama of plotting to set verbal traps for Republicans. Responded Obama, "Losersayswhat?" –Seth Meyers

According to a new study by the CDC, women are more likely than men to experiment with same-sex partners. Said men, “What channel is CDC?” –Seth Meyers

McDonald’s is trying out a new concept restaurant in Hong Kong called McDonald’s Next, which features a 19-item salad bar including quinoa. It’s sure to have customers saying, “I’ll have a Big Mac." –Seth Meyers