Donald
Trump is on the show tonight, and I'm not saying security is tight, but the
Secret Service just built a giant wall around the building — we had to pay for
it! –Jimmy Fallon
Republican
candidates aired a dozen new TV ads last week, even though recent data has
shown that TV ads are mostly ineffective. Chris Christie was like, “If TV ads
aren't effective, why do I keep going to Wendy's for their Gouda Bacon
Cheeseburger, here ONLY for a limited time?” –Jimmy Fallon
A
day after he was caught, it came out that Mexican drug lord El Chapo actually
sat down for an interview with Sean Penn while he was on the run. In the
interview, El Chapo described himself as “a person who's not looking for
problems in any way.” You know, except for that whole “Mexican drug lord”
thing. “I’m just a humble drug lord! I chop up my enemies one leg at a time,
just like anybody else.” –Jimmy Fallon
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