What kind of sicko would sexualize In-N-Out?

Tonight, Hillary Clinton and Bernie Sanders debated in Brooklyn. And they’ll follow that up tomorrow with a rap battle in the Bronx. --Conan O’Brien

When asked about his potential running mates, Donald Trump said he would consider Marco Rubio, Scott Walker, and John Kasich. Or as Trump calls them, "Shrimpy, Stupidface, and Loser." --Conan O’Brien

A man has been sentenced to five years in jail for trying to smuggle 51 turtles in his pants. The man has already told his cellmate, "There’s nothing you can do to me that 51 turtles haven’t." --Conan O’Brien

Russian President Vladimir Putin appeared on a call-in show for Russian television and he actually took questions. The most common question Putin got was, "Will I ever see my family again?" --Conan O’Brien

The hamburger chain In-N-Out is upset because a bikini-clad woman made a video of herself handling their meat in a suggestive way. The CEO said, "What kind of sicko would sexualize In-N-Out?" --Conan O’Brien