those last few customers really got their money's worth

Bernie Sanders said today that none of the ideas he's proposed in his campaign are radical or unrealistic other than, of course, the idea of a 74-year-old Jewish president with a $2 haircut. –Seth Meyers

House Speaker Paul Ryan today continued to shoot down rumors that he could be a surprise candidate at the Republican convention and said that he's not the fresh face his party needs. I guess he hasn't gotten a look at the other faces in contention. –Seth Meyers

Donald Trump said in a recent interview that the press conference held to announce his candidacy for president looked like the Academy Awards. No black people. –Seth Meyers

A man was arrested on Friday by Secret Service officers for climbing over the White House fence. "I just wanted to see the Oval Office," said Jeb. –Seth Meyers

Disneyland Paris is temporarily shutting down its haunted house after an employee was found dead inside the attraction. But those last few customers really got their money's worth. –Seth Meyers