That’s all we needed to hear, said Child Protective Services (I am already in misery)

According to Axios, President Trump is adding an 11th rally ahead of the upcoming midterms that will take place in Missouri. When asked if she was going with him, Melania said, "I am already in misery." --Seth Meyers

That’s right. According to a new poll, 29% of people believe President Trump is a good role model for children. ”That’s all we needed to hear,” said Child Protective Services. --Seth Meyers

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

You don’t have to tell her 16 times (half Jason and half lemonade)

On Super Tuesday President Biden lost the Democratic caucuses in American Samoa to Jason Palmer, ‘a previously’ little-known long-shot challenger, according to Axios. Yes previously little known, also currently little known. I myself just recently learned that a Jason Palmer is half Jason and half lemonade. —Stephen Colbert

“Presidential candidate Nikki Haley announced today that she is ending her campaign for the Republican nomination. Well, she’s a reasonable person. You don’t have to tell her 16 times.” —Seth Meyers

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Jesus wants justice (Our idiot son-in-law)

It was announced today that first lady Melania Trump's parents are now officially U.S. citizens. They passed their citizenship test when they were asked, “Who's the president of the United States?” and they replied, “Our idiot son-in-law.” --Seth Meyers

Axios today published a list of groups that President Trump has alienated during his first seven months of office. And now the world is out of paper. –Seth Meyers

President Trump’s inauguration singer, whose sister is transgender, recently called the president’s ban on transgender people in the military a disappointment. Well, sounds like someone is not getting invited to sing at his impeachment. –Seth Meyers

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.” 

 

After that, your day and his day start to diverge pretty wildly (He still holds a narrow lead over "Not Sure")

Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson put out a new alarm clock app today which includes a feature that will sync with The Rock's calendar so fans can wake up at the same time as him. After that, your day and his day start to diverge pretty wildly. –Seth Meyers

A source has told Axios that President Trump is triggered by the leaks about special counsel Robert Mueller's investigation, and his instinct is always to be on the offensive. So yeah, it’s not a real good time to meet with the leader of North Korea. Before he leaves, let's also give him a bunch of Red Bull and remind him Hillary won the popular vote. --Seth Meyers

Indiana is holding its primary today, and Donald Trump is currently leading Ted Cruz by 15 points. While John Kasich still holds a narrow lead over "Not Sure." –Seth Meyers

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

He’s six spots behind a snowman made of mayonnaise (Money won't change me)

January 2022

“At the White House on Monday, President Biden referred to Peter Doocy, a Fox News reporter, as a ‘stupid son of a bitch’ in a hot-mic moment. When your age is almost 80 and your approval rating’s almost 30, you can pretty much say whatever you want, I think.” —Jimmy Fallon

“Hey, listen, if Biden’s next three years are going to be grandpa at Thanksgiving, sign me up.” —Jimmy Fallon

“In other disappointing news for the former president, there is a new analysis of social media impressions by Axios, which found that the most talked about politician online was the Texas senator Ted Cruz, followed by congresswomen Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, Marjorie Taylor Greene and Rashida Tlaib. Trump was seventh on the list, behind Nancy Pelosi. Wow, good thing Trump doesn’t care about polls and publicity and ratings and stuff like that. He’s six spots behind Ted Cruz. He’s six spots behind a snowman made of mayonnaise.” —Jimmy Kimmel

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/12/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and_10.html

#1001Ways #RandomThoughts #poetry

 

It’s kind of like how a plane crash is actually a successful landing if you ignore everything besides the black box (Here's What Happened)

August 2020

“Donald Trump’s disastrous and heavily memed interview with reporter Jonathan Swan for Axios could’ve also doubled as an intake exam at a psych ward, which is why the president returned this week to the softer side of his media bubble: the morning show Fox & Friends. 

The morning show on Fox New lets Trump get away with any lie no matter how outrageous, which was why the president called in for a 53-minute rambling interview on Wednesday morning, and repeated one of his most sociopathic lies: that the coronavirus is, to quote the president, ‘just going away, it will go away like things go away’. 

Is he talking about a pandemic or a summer romance?Seriously, just stop saying stuff like that. You’ve been saying it for six months and it’s both wrong and dangerous. Trump brags about how successful his administration has been at handling the virus. Really? It’s kind of like how a plane crash is actually a successful landing if you ignore everything besides the black box.” —Seth Meyers

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

It’s an election, not the results of a Covid test (the last place man would look)

August 2020

“After his disastrous Axios interview, Trump cocooned himself with the weighted blanket that is Fox & Friends. The return to his beloved softball morning show after Axios and another widely mocked interview with Fox News’s Chris Wallace demonstrated how Trump basically tried dating other shows then ended up back with his ex. The 53-minute ramble to Fox & Friends went pretty much how you’d expect, – at one point, Trump tried to instill fear over mail-in voting for the November election, claiming such a practice would delay results for ‘months and months, actually could be for years’. Months or years? It’s an election, not the results of a Covid test.” —Jimmy Fallon

“Yeah, Trump was like, ‘It’s going to take a while. Imagine the time it takes me to walk down a ramp — now double that.” —Jimmy Fallon

“The Fox & Friends interview also asked Trump about reports that he’s considered giving his acceptance speech for the Republican presidential ticket from the White House instead of the convention in Florida; Trump said such a decision would be ‘easiest from the standpoint of security’ in a ‘beautiful setting’ where he’s spent a lot of time. No mention of coronavirus. Basically, Trump’s message is: Nobody should worry about the virus. Anyway, totally unrelated, I’ll be giving my speech from home.” —Jimmy Fallon

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

looking like a tourist who just watched a Times Square Elmo drop his pants and take a sh*t on the sidewalk

August 2020

“All week, memes and scorn from Trump’s much-maligned interview with Axios’s Jonathan Swan have circled on social media and in headlines, which is why Trump rarely steps outside his rightwing media bubble. His brain is pureed cottage cheese and he can’t withstand the slightest scrutiny and, inside the bubble, the ghouls who profit off of him can make him seem alive so they can keep partying at his cool house. But when he does dabble outside the rightwing media sphere, we end up with Jonathan Swan from Axios looking like a tourist who just watched a Times Square Elmo drop his pants and take a shit on the sidewalk.” —Seth Meyers

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

the same way Republicans suddenly ‘won’t know’ Trump after November 4th (can we get back to me?)

“Trump’s flailing interview with Axios, which offered no shortage of jaw-dropping bits, Jonathan Swan asked Trump, for instance, how history would remember John Lewis; Trump said ‘I don’t know’ because he didn’t know John Lewis – I guess in the same way Republicans suddenly ‘won’t know’ Trump after November 4th. 

Trump also claimed the coronavirus pandemic – which has killed nearly 160,000 Americans to date, has gutted the economy, kept schoolchildren home and sent unemployment soaring – is ‘under control’. What? You’re not controlling it at all. You’re handling the pandemic the same way parents handle a third child. 

As for Trump’s ‘it is what it is’ shrug at the coronavirus death toll Meyers had few words. God, he’s like the last resort friend you confide in during the break-up. (Meyers as Trump): ‘Yeah it’s sad but it is what it is … can we get back to me?’” 

—Seth Meyers

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

An angry a**hole in a red hat (asked a shockingly confident Mitch McConnell)

We got him okay. So that's the good news. The man who sent bombs pipe bombs to 12 people in an attempt to decimate the upper ranks of one of America's major political parties and it turned out to be he is exactly what you thought. An angry asshole in a red hat. --Bill Maher

According to a new Gallup poll, 57% of Americans say there is a need for a third major political party, though I think a lot of people would be happy if there was a second one. --Seth Meyers

According to new research, the most commonly fantasized about politician among both Republicans and Democrats is Sarah Palin. "Who was number two?" asked a shockingly confident Mitch McConnell. --Seth Meyers

According to Axios, President Trump is adding an 11th rally ahead of the upcoming midterms that will take place in Missouri. When asked if she was going with him, Melania said, "I am already in misery." --Seth Meyers

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Well you know what they say, the apple doesn’t fall far from the orange (If you want to go forward CHOOSE "D")

According to Axios, during discussions about renewable energy, President Trump has more than once declared to administration officials, quote, “I hate the wind.” Which is bad news for his lawyer, who also blows. --Seth Meyers

According to The New York Times, Ivanka Trump, like President Trump, is said to hold grudges. Well you know what they say, the apple doesn’t fall far from the orange. --Seth Meyers

MTV has announced it’s working on a new reality show with Lindsay Lohan. Well, she’s been working on it for years — MTV just decided to start filming it. --Seth Meyers

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”  

a sixth branch of the military called the "Space Force." (The Ludovico Technique)

A source has told Axios that President Trump is triggered by the leaks about special counsel Robert Mueller's investigation, and his instinct is always to be on the offensive. So yeah, real good time to meet with the leader of North Korea. Before he leaves, let's also give him a bunch of Red Bull and remind him Hillary won the popular vote. --Seth Meyers

President Trump said yesterday he is seriously thinking of creating a sixth branch of the military called the "Space Force." They'll patrol the distant reaches between him and Melania. --Seth Meyers

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Trump's plan is to be so guilty of so many things that Mueller just works himself to death (Yeah, totally, me too, I was just checking)

Sources recently told Axios that during a phone call last year, President Trump asked Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu if he actually cares about peace, followed by, “Yeah, totally, me too, I was just checking.” --Seth Meyers

White House press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders said today that President Trump has no intention of firing special counsel Robert Mueller. Instead, Trump's plan is to be so guilty of so many things that Mueller just works himself to death. --Seth Meyers

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Uncle Sam Wants You ... Bad (the world is out of paper)

Some schools are giving kids an Eclipse Day, a day off, because they’re worried teachers might not be able to protect their eyes. These kids haven’t looked up from their phones since January. –Jimmy Kimmel

     

"This week, the U.S. Army removed several recruiting ads from a web site because the web site targets homosexual men. The ad said, 'Uncle Sam Wants You ... Bad.'" --Conan O'Brien

Axios today published a list of groups that President Trump has alienated during his first seven months of office. And now the world is out of paper. –Seth Meyers

     

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #FeeltheBern #Bernie2020 #repealreplacerepublicans