June 2021
“In typical Trump fashion, he also badly mispronounced some words. At one point, while attempting to reference the first man on the moon, Neil Armstrong, Trump said the US ‘sent a brave young man from Ohio to a plant.’ Really? To a plant? Yes, he was a brave young man from Ohio named Jack, and the nation sent him to climb that beanstalk, where he skyrocketed to Feefifofum. He’s trying to talk about Neil Armstrong, but he said plant when he meant planet, which is not where Neil Armstrong went. That’s like trying to describe George Washington by saying, ‘You know who I mean! The guy on the money with the teeth made out of the cherry tree, with the painting of him crossing the Deli-meats, you know!’” —Stephen Colbert
“In other news, Trump’s former attorney general William Barr continues to publicly distance himself from his former boss. In an interview with the Atlantic published over the weekend, Barr claimed that he always thought Trump’s baseless claims of election fraud were ‘all bullshit’. And Bill Barr should know – he spent the last two years with his lips very close to that bull’s ass.” —Stephen Colbert
“William Barr also said that Mitch McConnell urged him to speak out against the big lie of voting fraud in the immediate aftermath of the election, while the Senate minority leader remained mum himself. McConnell would’ve spoken the truth himself last December, but he needed the former president’s help to ensure that the GOP won the two runoff elections in Georgia, which they lost. In the end, Mitch McConnell sold his soul for nothing. So, a pretty fair price.” —Stephen Colbert
https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night
of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”
