they’re just gonna lay low for a while (laid down the boogie)

The Girl Scouts have announced that they will offer 23 new badges focused on science, technology, engineering and math. While the Boy Scouts have announced they’re just gonna lay low for a while. –Seth Meyers

According to a new report from BP, the earth will run out of oil in 53 years. Luckily, thanks to BP, the ocean will still have plenty.--Seth Meyers

"According to a new poll, two-thirds of people in Colorado think it should be illegal to smoke marijuana in public, while the other one-third are still laughing at the word 'poll.'" –Seth Meyers

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Scariest Campfire Story (Wait, was it me?)

And we’re still getting to know Donald Trump’s new

communications director, Anthony Scaramucci. I saw

that his friends like to call him “the Mooch.” When

Trump heard, he was like, “Great, now what am I gonna

call Don Jr. and Eric?” –Jimmy Fallon

But people are still talking about this. Last night, President Trump gave a big speech at the Boy Scouts of America National Scout Jamboree. His healthcare bill won the award for “Scariest Campfire Story.” –Jimmy Fallon

This morning, two senators were caught on a hot mic calling President Trump "crazy." And when the news came out, literally every member of the Senate was like, "Wait, was it me?" –Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.” 

 

Between the Boy Scouts and gay marriage, Republicans really don’t want gays tying the knot (jockeying for the title of biggest disaster)

"British Petroleum stopped the oil leak at 3:25 p.m. Eastern Time. And at 3:26 p.m., Mel Gibson and Lindsay Lohan began jockeying for the title of 'biggest disaster.'" –Jimmy Fallon

Rick Perry said this weekend that he believes Boy Scouts would be “better off if they didn’t have openly gay scoutmasters.” Man, between the Boy Scouts and gay marriage, Republicans really don’t want gays tying the knot. –Seth Meyers

“In other news, Fox News Media plans to launch a 24-hour weather channel later this year. Finally, branching out into something where it’s acceptable to be wrong half the time.” —Seth Meyers

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.” 

 

It's amazing how mature and civil conservatives are (the Boy Scouts have announced they’re just gonna lay low for a while)

According to The Washington Post, President Trump is considering Ted Cruz as a replacement for Attorney General Jeff Sessions. And if you thought Jeff Sessions was bad, you were right. –Seth Meyers

Newly appointed White House Communications Director Anthony Scaramucci said today that he’s not a backstabber, but “more of a front-stabbing person.” And it’s very telling about this administration that they think there’s a right way to stab somebody. “I stab from the front, underhand. Like a gentleman.” –Seth Meyers

The Girl Scouts have announced that they will offer 23 new badges focused on science, technology, engineering and math. While the Boy Scouts have announced they’re just gonna lay low for a while. –Seth Meyers

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

The purpose of her trip hasn't been announced. But I'm guessing sanctuary? (They have apologized for quote, “All of it.”)

A new article has been published ranking New York City’s best public restrooms. So congratulations yet again to ... the subway! –Seth Meyers

Alaska Airlines apologized today to a gay couple after asking one

of them to move so that a straight couple could sit together.

Meanwhile Spirit Airlines apologized for quote, “All of it.”

--Seth Meyers

The Girl Scouts have announced that they will offer 23 new badges

focused on science, technology, engineering and math. While the

Boy Scouts have announced they’re just gonna lay low for a while.

–Seth Meyers

First lady Melania Trump announced today that her first solo international trip will be to Toronto, Canada. The purpose of her trip hasn't been announced. But I'm guessing sanctuary? –Seth Meyers

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Wow, that's great. What is a bus? (you're not allowed to pitch a tent if a girl is nearby)

July 2012

"The country's largest Tea Party group is planning a cross-country bus tour to help elect Mitt Romney. Romney was like, 'Wow, that's great. What is a bus?'" –Jimmy Fallon

"The Boy Scouts of America have announced they are upholding their ban on gay members. The Boy Scouts are so serious about this gay ban, that you're not allowed to pitch a tent if a girl is nearby." –Jay Leno

"Mitt Romney's search for a vice president continues As you know, one of Mitt Romney's problems is that he's never hired an American for a job before, so this is new." –Jay Leno

"The apartment that President Obama used to live in when he was a college student in New York is now up for rent for $2,400 a month. Coincidentally, Obama was only there for one four-year term." –Jay Leno

"A new study published by The British Medical Journal found that inactivity can kill you. I mean, these are the kind of findings that just scare the hell out of Congress." –Jay Leno

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 

A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Batman is a republican (tying knots)

July 2012

"North Korean leader Kim Jong Un has been awarded the highest rank in the country’s military. The decision was praised by everyone from Parliamentary leader Kim Jong Un to opposition leader Kim Jong Un." –Conan O'Brien

"We're learning more and more about this guy Kim Jong-Un. New vicious, evil dictator of North Korea. Quite a . . . Apparently quite a ladies' man. For a long time he was known as Kim Jong Clooney." –David Letterman

"Batman is a billionaire who doesn't trust the system to get the job done. He has a butler and an awesome car that gets like two miles to the gallon. He is the most republican superhero of all time! Batman is a republican." –Craig Ferguson

"The Boy Scouts of American has announced that they will continue to enforce their policy of banning opening gay boys from being scouts and openly gay adults from taking leadership positions in the organization. Between this and same sex marriage, people really don't want gay people tying knots." –Jimmy Kimmel

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 

A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

It wouldn't have anything to do with corporate greed, would it? (The location of Sex Island)

It was reported that the Boy Scouts of America are considering filing for bankruptcy in the face of declining membership. Apparently there’s some problem with their business model of hoping parents will pay adult strangers to take their children deep into the woods. --Colin Jost, SNL

The location of Sex Island, which is a four day drug fueled event featuring prostitutes at an exclusive resort is revealed to be an island off the coast of Trinidad and Tobago. This according to the plane ticket I saw in Che’s hands. --Colin Jost, SNL

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Bahrain is what Donald Trump calls the thing in his head (with all that cookie money)

According to The New York Times, Rudy Giuliani was in Bahrain this week to get a contract for his firm. Incidentally, a Bahrain is what Donald Trump calls the thing in his head. --Seth Meyers

According to The Wall Street Journal, the Boy Scouts of America are considering filing for bankruptcy. Meanwhile, the Girl Scouts are planning to buy a house in the Hamptons with all that cookie money. --Seth Meyers

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

And weirdly, I don’t feel tired from all the winning yet (open sewers)

Sean Spicer’s out, Reince Priebus is out, Trumpcare is dead, and Kim Jong Un has a missile that can reach New York. And weirdly, I don’t feel tired from all the winning yet. –Jimmy Kimmel

The president has been very busy repealing and replacing his staff, most notably Anthony Scaramucci, the Mooch, who 10 days ago was named the White House communications director. Today he’s out of a job. –Jimmy Kimmel

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #FeeltheBern @BrandNew535 @justicedems #Bernie2020 #repealreplacerepublicans

this is a very sensitive issue, so he made sure to choose his emoji's very carefully (Jamboree)

Some big political news. Today President Trump went on Twitter and announced that he is banning transgender people from serving in the military. Trump said he understands this is a very sensitive issue, so he made sure to choose his emoji's very carefully. –Jimmy Fallon

Actually, Trump says that he's banning transgender people from serving because of high medical costs. If he cares so much about high medical costs, maybe he should pass a healthcare bill. –Jimmy Fallon

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #FeeltheBern @justicedems @BrandNew535 #Bernie2020 #repealreplacerepublicans

And if you thought Jeff Sessions was bad, you were right (eye rolling merit badge)

President Trump spoke yesterday at the Boy Scout Jamboree and bragged about his election victory over Hillary Clinton. And every Scout in attendance earned the merit badge for eye rolling. –Seth Meyers

According to The Washington Post, President Trump is considering Ted Cruz as a replacement for Attorney General Jeff Sessions. And if you thought Jeff Sessions was bad, you were right. –Seth Meyers

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #FeeltheBern @justicedems @BrandNew535 #Bernie2020 #repealreplacerepublicans

Dude, we're ten (gonna lay low for a while)

Yesterday Donald Trump spoke at the National Boy Scout Jamboree. And it was horrific. During his speech, Trump told the Scouts that Health and Human Resources Secretary Tom Price would be fired if Congress doesn't repeal and replace Obamacare. To which the Boy Scouts replied, "Dude, we're ten." On the bright side, every Scout in attendance was able to earn his badge for "Listening to an old man (bleep) about his job." –James Corden

The Girl Scouts have announced that they will offer 23 new badges focused on science, technology, engineering and math. While the Boy Scouts have announced they’re just gonna lay low for a while. –Seth Meyers

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #FeeltheBern @justicedems @BrandNew535 #Bernie2020 #repealreplacerepublicans

Trump's healthcare bill won the award for “Scariest Campfire Story.”

This morning, two senators were caught on a hot mic calling President Trump "crazy." And when the news came out, literally every member of the Senate was like, "Wait, was it me?" –Jimmy Fallon

But people are still talking about this. Last night, President Trump gave a big speech at the Boy Scouts of America National Scout Jamboree. His healthcare bill won the award for “Scariest Campfire Story.” –Jimmy Fallon

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #FeeltheBern @justicedems @BrandNew535 #Bernie2020 #repealreplacerepublicans

Republicans really don’t want gays tying the knot

On Saturday Donald Trump had some unkind words for Arizona Senator John McCain. Can you imagine being tortured 5 1/2 years in a Vietnamese prison camp, and then a man whose greatest war-time accomplishment was brokering a peace treaty on "Celebrity Apprentice" between Gary Busey and Meat Loaf belittles you and calls you a loser? –Jimmy Kimmel

Rick Perry said this weekend that he believes Boy Scouts would be “better off if they didn’t have openly gay scoutmasters.” Man, between the Boy Scouts and gay marriage, Republicans really don’t want gays tying the knot. –Seth Meyers