Attorney General Letitia James claims President Trump is having her watched. It could be worse, he could be having her weighed. —Greg Gutfeld
Yesterday of course was Mother's Day and next month it's Father's Day, which raises the question does Caitlyn Jenner get two gifts. —Greg Gutfeld
https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
There is news of Donald Trump’s latest gag order, in which the New York judge warned that Trump could lose access to his jurors’ names if he does anything to harm the integrity of the jury selection process. Why does he have access to the jurors’ names?! That’s like giving Cruella DeVille the address of the local animal shelter. —Seth Meyers
In a new fundraising email, Donald Trump Jr. warned that the New York attorney general, Letitia James, is trying to seize Trump Tower, and said that she is “seizing my boyhood home”. Boyhood home? It’s not a shack on the banks of the Mississippi! It’s weird to call something your boyhood home when it has a restaurant in the lobby. —Seth Meyers
https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”
“It’s Biden-Trump. It’s always been Biden-Trump. It will always be Biden-Trump. But not if you ask the voters, who seem to still be in denial. There is a recent poll which found that nearly half of voters think it’s likely that Democrats will replace Biden with another candidate before the election. No! No they won’t! It’s Trump versus Biden, stop making up election fan fiction – ‘Ooh, what if Tom Brady comes out of retirement for president, he could make Gronk secretary of Gronking. And then they kiss.’” —Stephen Colbert
In a new print interview with the New Yorker, Joe Biden assured that he would beat Trump and noted: “I am the only one who has ever beat him.” Well, that’s true unless you count E Jean Carroll, [New York attorney general] Letitia James, Covid, the free market and ramps. —Seth Meyers
An Amazon warehouse near Seattle recently began testing a 5ft 9in robot that resembles a human. He’s so life-like, his Tinder profile says he’s 6ft 1in. —Seth Meyers
https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
“Donald Trump, who didn’t attend his fraud trial in New York on Thursday, where he faces charges of deceiving banks, insurers and others by providing financial statements that greatly exaggerated his wealth. New York’s attorney general, Letitia James, is seeking $250m in penalties and a ban on Trump doing business in the state. The former president reportedly got frustrated on Wednesday and left halfway through the day’s proceedings, as if it was Don Jr’s 10th birthday party or something. Of course he left. Do we actually expect him to sit here and listen to testimony in court day after day? The man has an attention span of a baby goldfish swimming in a bowl full of Four Loko.” —Jimmy Kimmel
“Furthermore, the GOP infighting has gotten so intense and so personal that Republicans are starting to make salacious allegations about each other on television. A republican congressman told CNN that Matt Gaetz had bragged to his House colleagues about the girls that he had slept with and how he would crush erectile dysunction medicine and chase it with an energy drink so he could go all night. Not only does Matt Gaetz definitely look like the spokesman for an ED medicine-infused energy drink, his name even has a Z that you know is on the can. As for the congressman’s claim of chasing the ED medicine with energy drinks – that sounds like something Rudy Giuliani would do by accident.” —Seth Meyers
https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
“Former president Donald Trump is facing an assload of legal trouble, even as he remains the favorite for many Republicans to lead the party again. In a Fox News interview with Sean Hannity, Trump fully disintegrated into a sweaty red-faced rambling incoherent mess and he continues to have the confidence of a man who is ready for anything while being prepared for nothing.” —Seth Meyers
“This week also saw the New York attorney general, Letitia James, announce a $250 million lawsuit against Trump and his family for ‘staggering fraud’, listing a long number of accusations. At this point it would just be easier to list the crimes Trump hasn’t committed.” —Seth Meyers
“In Trump’s interview with Hannity, Trump said he can declassify documents with his mind in response to the FBI raid that found boxes of classified material at his Miami property. Trump seems to think it’s like calling dibs and that his process implied that his newest legal adviser is Tinkerbell. This justification would also rely on Trump being capable of thinking about things, although a judge would rule that there’s just nothing going on in there. Trump is like an emu who just found the zoo camera.” —Seth Meyers
https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
“New York’s attorney general, Letitia James’s closing lines from the press conference: ‘Claiming you have money that you do not have does not amount to the art of the deal. It’s the art of the steal.’ Ooh, Donald Trump is in trouble now, because when a prosecutor uses a rhyme, you’re about to do time.” —Trevor Noah
“I’m not gonna lie, I’m not optimistic. But if half of what Trump is saying is true, Trump is an even bigger conman than we all thought. These are not small amounts, claiming your 11,000 square ft apartment is 30,000 square feet. Which is a lie. So this man is going to be the first person to ever get in legal trouble for claiming his apartment is a grower not a show-er. It would be so funny if this is what takes Trump down. Can you imagine? He tries to overthrow the government, but they get him for lying about having an in-unit washer-dryer.” —Trevor Noah
“New York’s attorney general, Letitia James, said that her office has filed a lawsuit against Trump and his family for ‘staggering’ bank, tax and insurance fraud. According to the lawsuit, Trump valued Mar-a-Lago at $739 million when it was worth only $75 million, and claimed an 11,000 square foot apartment was actually 30,000 square feet – which is the same strategy he’s used for years with his penis.” —Jimmy Kimmel
https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
“According to the lawsuit, Trump would fraudulently inflate the value of his properties so he could use them as collateral for huge loans. And when it comes to faking the numbers, Letitia James isn’t. She has the receipts, over 200 of them, including claims from Trump’s company that a dozen rent-stabilized apartments were worth more than $49.5 million, when in fact they had been appraised at a combined $750,000. That is 65 times less money. And it’s no surprise – the president is known for inflated assets, I mean, have you seen a picture of Trump in tennis shorts.” —Stephen Colbert
“I’m guessing this press conference got the ex-prez rankled to his cankles, because the one thing he hates more than anything is people hearing he’s not as rich as he claims he is. Mar-a-Lago, for example, is valued at $75 million, but Trump claimed it was worth $739 million. Well of course it’s worth less now! The FBI just took away all the most re-sellable documents.” —Stephen Colbert
https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
“According to documents filed by the attorney general in New York last night, they’ve uncovered evidence that indicates the Trump Organization repeatedly engaged in ‘fraudulent or misleading’ practices. The walls appear to be closing in on Trump — big, beautiful walls. Mexico’s like, ‘Let us know if you need us to chip in with that, muchachos.’” —Jimmy Kimmel
“New York State’s attorney general, Letitia James, says that her office has uncovered significant evidence that the former president fraudulently valued multiple assets, including his own private residence. He claimed the triplex apartment was 30,000 square feet in size, but the actual size was just under 11,000 square feet. Yeah, that’s no surprise — he’s known for falsely tripling the size of his assets.” —Stephen Colbert
“You know how when people are shocked, they spit out their water? When I heard Donald Trump exaggerated the value of his assets for the purposes of lying to banks and the I.R.S., it was so the reverse of shocking, I sucked the water back into my mouth.” —Seth Meyers
“But it’s a fairly straightforward case. To find fraud in a business, you just have to look for the signs — particularly the signs at the top of the building that say ‘Trump’ on them — and you will find it there. There is where you will find his male pattern fraudness.” —Jimmy Kimmel
“I mean, at the same time, Donald Trump does not give a [expletive]. Let’s be honest: This dude will brag about himself even if it gets him in trouble. I bet when a cop asks him if he knows how fast he was going, he’s like, ‘Yeah, I do, 400 billion miles a second, the fastest anyone has ever gone. I was so fast. So fast.’” —Trevor Noah
https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/12/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and_10.html
#1001Ways #RandomThoughts #poetry
