but if you want to lick it, it’s a quarter (I go by thickness)

"George Bush says we are losing the War on Drugs. You know what

that implies? There's a war being fought and people on drugs are

winning it!" – Bill Hicks

A person told me that I was wearing two different colored socks. I

said it was true, but to me they were the same because I go by

thickness. –Steven Wright

The Post Office announced today that it is going to issue a stamp

commemorating prostitution in the United States. It’s a ten cent

stamp, but if you want to lick it, it’s a quarter. --Chevy Chase, SNL

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

I go by thickness (but if you want to lick it, it’s a quarter)

"George Bush says we are losing the War on Drugs. You know what that implies? There's a war being fought and people on drugs are winning it!" – Bill Hicks

A person told me that I was wearing two different colored socks. I said it was true, but to me they were the same because I go by thickness. –Steven Wright

The Post Office announced today that it is going to issue a stamp commemorating prostitution in the United States. It’s a ten cent stamp, but if you want to lick it, it’s a quarter. --Chevy Chase, SNL

And in music news number one on the college charts this summer was the band Better Than Ezra. At number two, Ezra. --Norm Macdonald, SNL

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

There's a war being fought and people on drugs are winning it! (but if you want to lick it, it’s a quarter)

"George Bush says we are losing the War on Drugs. You know what that implies? There's a war being fought and people on drugs are winning it!" – Bill Hicks

A person told me that I was wearing two different colored socks. I said it was true, but to me they were the same because I go by thickness. –Steven Wright

The Post Office announced today that it is going to issue a stamp commemorating prostitution in the United States. It’s a ten cent stamp, but if you want to lick it, it’s a quarter. --Chevy Chase, SNL

And in music news number one on the college charts this summer was the band Better Than Ezra. At number two, Ezra. --Norm Macdonald, SNL

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

because I go by thickness (keep that sh*t up)

"George Bush says we are losing the War on Drugs. You know what that implies? There's a war being fought and people on drugs are winning it!" – Bill Hicks

A person told me that I was wearing two different colored socks. I said it was true, but to me they were the same because I go by thickness. –Steven Wright

The Post Office announced today that it is going to issue a stamp commemorating prostitution in the United States. It’s a ten cent stamp, but if you want to lick it, it’s a quarter. --Chevy Chase, SNL

And in music news number one on the college charts this summer was the band Better Than Ezra. At number two, Ezra. --Norm Macdonald, SNL

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

There's a war being fought and people on drugs are winning it! (but if you want to lick it, it’s a quarter)

"George Bush says we are losing the War on Drugs. You know

what that implies? There's a war being fought and people on drugs

are winning it!" – Bill Hicks

The Post Office announced today that it is going to issue a stamp commemorating prostitution in the United States. It’s a ten cent stamp, but if you want to lick it, it’s a quarter. --Chevy Chase, SNL

And in music news number one on the college charts this summer was the band Better Than Ezra. At number two, Ezra. --Norm Macdonald, SNL

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

There's a war being fought and people on drugs are winning it! (At number two, Ezra)

The Post Office announced today that it is going to issue a stamp commemorating prostitution in the United States. It’s a ten cent stamp, but if you want to lick it, it’s a quarter. --Chevy Chase, SNL

"George Bush says we are losing the War on Drugs. You know what that implies? There's a war being fought and people on drugs are winning it!" – Bill Hicks

And in music news number one on the college charts this summer was the band Better Than Ezra. At number two, Ezra. --Norm Macdonald, SNL

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

It’s a ten cent stamp, but if you want to lick it, it’s a quarter (There's a war being fought and people on drugs are winning it!)

The Post Office announced today that it is going to issue a stamp commemorating prostitution in the United States. It’s a ten cent stamp, but if you want to lick it, it’s a quarter. --Chevy Chase, SNL

"George Bush says we are losing the War on Drugs. You know what that implies? There's a war being fought and people on drugs are winning it!" – Bill Hicks

And in music news number one on the college charts this summer was the band Better Than Ezra. At number two, Ezra. --Norm Macdonald, SNL

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

What a genius, he'll be missed (if you want to lick it, it’s a quarter)

And in music news number one on the college charts this summer was the band Better Than Ezra. At number two, Ezra. --Norm Macdonald, SNL

The Post Office announced today that it is going to issue a stamp commemorating prostitution in the United States. It’s a ten cent stamp, but if you want to lick it, it’s a quarter. --Chevy Chase, SNL

Dr. James Watts, a neurosurgeon who performed the first frontal lobotomy died this week in Washington. If you recall, a lobotomy involves drilling holes in the skull and then inserting and rotating a knife to destroy brain cells. What a genius, he'll be missed. --Norm Macdonald, SNL

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Their advice, introduce yourself to as many people as possible (but if you want to lick it, it’s a quarter)

A new FBI study shows that for the first time Americans are more likely to be killed by a stranger than a loved one or acquaintance. Their advice, introduce yourself to as many people as possible. --Norm Macdonald, SNL

The American Academy of Pediatrics has released an updated list of unsafe baby products. Topping the list this year is the really really really really high chair. --Norm Macdonald, SNL

The Post Office announced today that it is going to issue a stamp commemorating prostitution in the United States. It’s a ten cent stamp, but if you want to lick it, it’s a quarter. --Chevy Chase, SNL

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

That's my lucky stabbing hat!/for $35 she'll show you/if you want to lick it, it’s a quarter

The Post Office announced today that it is going to issue a stamp commemorating prostitution in the United States. It’s a ten cent stamp, but if you want to lick it, it’s a quarter. --Chevy Chase, SNL

Hollywood prostitute Divine Brown is writing a book describing in lurid detail exactly what she did with Hugh Grant. The book sells for $25 but for $35 she'll show you. --Norm Macdonald, SNL

At the White House this week President Clinton officially came out against same-sex marriages. What's more the president said he is not too crazy about opposite sex marriages either. --Norm Macdonald, SNL

In a brilliant move during closing arguments the O.J. Simpson Attorney, Johnnie Cochran, put on the knit cap prosecutors say OJ wore the night he committed the murders. Although OJ may have hurt his case when he suddenly blurted out, “Hey easy with that! That's my lucky stabbing hat!” --Norm Macdonald, SNL

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 

A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Apparently, his bone spurs are retractable, like cat’s claws (but if you want to lick it, it’s a quarter)

I’m going on vacation next week. Donald Trump is planning a vacation, too. On Wednesday, he’s going to Vietnam. Apparently, his bone spurs are retractable, like cat’s claws. --Stephen Colbert

But Trump is going to Vietnam to hold his second summit with North Korean dictator Kim Jong-Un. Seen here on a fun day of apple picking with friends he plans to murder. --Stephen Colbert

The Post Office announced today that it is going to issue a stamp commemorating prostitution in the United States. It’s a ten cent stamp, but if you want to lick it, it’s a quarter. --Chevy Chase, SNL

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”  

We must change things, because we cannot accept the way they are (much of it legally)

    

Chevy Chase on Saturday Night Live: "Former Senator and actor Fred Thompson said Monday that he had been certain of Saddam Hussein's weapons of mass destruction prior to the 2003 U.S.-led invasion. He added, [on screen: Chase falls asleep and snores]. While campaigning in New Hampshire, Rudy Giuliani insisted that his core support is from the evangelical voters because they know where he stands on the issues. While he can appeal to Mormons because he's had a few wives, Catholics will be drawn to him because his son hates him. He personally finds abortion morally repugnant, but feels that women should have the right to choose to divorce him. Meanwhile, Republican Mitt Romney, who is polling ever so close in the polls, admitted that his given name is Rubber Mittens, and that he does indeed comb his hair with olive oil and a fork. Hillary Clinton's campaign announced Monday that it raised over $27 million in the last quarter -- much of it legally."

     

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #Bernie2020 #FeeltheBern #repealreplacerepublicans

He hopes to make love, not war, and to buy the world a coke (Hindsight is 2020)

   

Chevy Chase on Saturday Night Live's Weekend Update: "In a startling moment during Wednesday's Democratic debate, former Senator Mike Gravel's head exploded. Then, in a chain reaction starting from one candidate's lectern to the next, John Edwards' hair parted itself on the opposite side, Barack Obama's ears flapped uncontrollably, Hillary Clinton instantly shot up in the polls, and Dennis Kucinich simply vanished, leaving his little blue suit splayed out over the podium. On Tuesday, candidate Barack Obama proposed setting a goal of eliminating all nuclear weapons in the world. A novel idea. He also hopes to save the polar ice caps, the whales, to make love, not war, and to buy the world a coke."

     

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #Bernie2020 #FeeltheBern #repealreplacerepublicans

But when you start stealing bits from “Weekend Update” anchors — it is ON!

In that interview, President Trump responded to questions about unsubstantiated claims he recently made, by saying, quote, “I can’t be doing so badly, because I’m president and you’re not.” OK, I didn’t mind when you talked dirty with Billy Bush, or told Russia to hack Hillary’s emails. [shows photo of Chevy Chase on ‘SNL’] But when you start stealing bits from “Weekend Update” anchors — it is ON! –Seth Meyers

Press secretary Sean Spicer said today that the White House was optimistic about the chances of the Republican healthcare bill, but, quote, “At the end of the day, we can’t make people vote.” [shows photo of Hillary] “Tell me about it,” said one woman. –Seth Meyers

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html

Hillary raised over $27 million in the last quarter -- much of it legally

Chevy Chase on Saturday Night Live: "While campaigning in New Hampshire, Rudy Giuliani insisted that his core support is from the evangelical voters because they know where he stands on the issues. While he can appeal to Mormons because he's had a few wives, Catholics will be drawn to him because his son hates him. He personally finds abortion morally repugnant, but feels that women should have the right to choose to divorce him. 

Meanwhile, Republican Mitt Romney, who is polling ever so close in the polls, admitted that his given name is Rubber Mittens, and that he does indeed comb his hair with olive oil and a fork. Hillary Clinton's campaign announced Monday that it raised over $27 million in the last quarter -- much of it legally." 

"In fact, Republicans are so mad about Larry Craig staying, they may ask  Cheney to take him out back and shoot him." --Jay Leno

"Beautiful day here in New York City. So beautiful today,  President Bush said, 'Maybe I won't do anything about global warming.'" --David Letterman

71% of women say they'd be extremely comfortable with Bill Clinton as a second husband

"Barack Obama's campaign announced Monday that they have raised more than $20 million in the last three months. Even more amazing, he did it all with a kissing booth." --Amy Poehler

"According to a poll, Bill Clinton has emerged as an asset in his wife's campaign, with 60% of Americans saying they would be comfortable with him as first husband. While 71% of women say they'd be extremely comfortable with him as a second husband." --Amy Poehler

Chevy Chase on Saturday Night Live's Weekend Update: "In a startling moment during Wednesday's Democratic debate, former Senator Mike Gravel's head exploded. Then, in a chain reaction starting from one candidate's lectern to the next, John Edwards' hair parted itself on the opposite side, Barack Obama's ears flapped uncontrollably, Hillary Clinton instantly shot up in the polls, and Dennis Kucinich simply vanished, leaving his little blue suit splayed out over the podium. On Tuesday, candidate Barack Obama proposed setting a goal of eliminating all nuclear weapons in the world. A novel idea. He also hopes to save the polar ice caps, the whales, to make love, not war, and to buy the world a coke."