They flare up at the most inopportune times (That’s money that could be used to launch giant p****es into space)

But when it comes to Donald Trump, a former senior White House official says, “He’s never been interested in going to visit troops in war zones. He’s afraid of those situations.” Stephen Colbert as Trump, “I’m ready to visit the troops. Oh! Oh! These damn bone spurs! You know what they say? They flare up at the most inopportune times.” --Stephen Colbert

“Of course, the pandemic has exacerbated our pre-existing condition of extremely rich people. A Bloomberg report on super-yacht charters, reports yacht charters are up over 340%. This is disgusting. At a time of dire need, the ultra-rich shouldn’t be blowing their money on boats. That’s money that could be used to launch giant penises into space.” —Stephen Colbert

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Snow Globes (trophy case/bone spurs)

“The news has once again gotten dumber and more exhausting. Just another day living in Donald Trump’s snow globe, where the snow is cocaine and it never stops shaking.” —Seth Meyers

“America’s been through a lot over the years, but the one thing we’ve mercifully never had to deal with was a president who had a boner for winning awards. You’re the president of the United States – that should be reward enough! This guy gets elected, and his next thought is ‘better make room in the trophy case.’” —Seth Meyers

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Not GR-R-REAT! (It’s Finger Losin’ Good!)

A drunk woman in Nebraska had to be hospitalized this weekend after she broke into a zoo because she wanted to pet a tiger and wound up being bitten by the animal. When asked how she’s doing, the woman said, “Not GR-R-REAT!” –Seth Meyers

A processing company that supplies chicken to KFC was fined this week after an employee lost two fingertips while on the job. Which explains their new slogan, “It’s Finger Losin’ Good!” –Seth Meyers

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Networks are telling female employees not to worry unless you're hot (they think she's Kid Rock)

So, former Today host Matt Lauer is considering a return to TV after being fired due to inappropriate sexual behavior. Networks are telling female employees not to worry unless you're hot. —Greg Gutfeld

Comedian Kathy Griffin claims she now is friends with Trump supporters. This is mostly because she's had so much work done they think she's Kid Rock. —Greg Gutfeld

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

We all assume he failed everything (He was a late spurrer)

Last week Michael Cohen told congress that Trump ordered him to threaten his high school to never release his grades. What could he possibly be hiding? We all assume he failed everything. --Stephen Colbert

Yesterday, the Washington Post reported more details about how far Trump went to make sure his academic record stayed hidden. At his high school the New York Military Academy. Yes, Military. Evidently, when Trump was a teenager, his bones hadn’t spurred yet. He was a late spurrer. --Stephen Colbert

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

They also apologized for airing footage of Ted Cruz, period. (Well, at least THEY do stuff together)

President Trump said this afternoon that he will adopt a "war-like posture" if House Democrats move to investigate him personally. That's right. He's going to develop bone spurs in his feet. --Seth Meyers

MSNBC apologized last night for airing footage of Democratic Senate candidate Beto O'Rourke cursing. They also apologized for airing footage of Ted Cruz, period. --Seth Meyers

According to NBC News, Special Counsel Robert Mueller has gathered enough evidence to charge former national security adviser Michael Flynn and his son as part of the Russia investigation. “Well, at least THEY do stuff together,” yelled Eric. –Seth Meyers

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Who can even remember who wired the global financial system to a roulette wheel, while jacked on enough cocaine to bring down a bison? (Make Jobs, Not War)

"It's been five years since the economic meltdown. And while even I used to be mad at Wall Street -- at this point, who can even remember who wired the global financial system to a roulette wheel, while jacked on enough cocaine to bring down a bison?" –Stephen Colbert

"GOP civil war -- of course the first thing they'll have to fight over is which side gets the Confederate flag." –Stephen Colbert

I’m going on vacation next week. Donald Trump is planning a vacation, too. On Wednesday, he’s going to Vietnam. Apparently, his bone spurs are retractable, like cat’s claws. --Stephen Colbert

 

"Since the brutal presidential election, there's been a lot of soul searching going on at Fox News. I am confident that they will eventually find one." –Stephen Colbert

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Apparently, his bone spurs are retractable, like cat’s claws (but if you want to lick it, it’s a quarter)

I’m going on vacation next week. Donald Trump is planning a vacation, too. On Wednesday, he’s going to Vietnam. Apparently, his bone spurs are retractable, like cat’s claws. --Stephen Colbert

But Trump is going to Vietnam to hold his second summit with North Korean dictator Kim Jong-Un. Seen here on a fun day of apple picking with friends he plans to murder. --Stephen Colbert

The Post Office announced today that it is going to issue a stamp commemorating prostitution in the United States. It’s a ten cent stamp, but if you want to lick it, it’s a quarter. --Chevy Chase, SNL

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”  

Do bone spurs keep you out of jail? (Asking for a friend)

First up, the Knicks. How is it possible that you play above Penn Station and still stink worse than anything in the building? You just traded your best player and went on an 18-game losing streak. You have a worse record than that team that plays the Harlem Globetrotters. --Seth Meyers

Also, you can dress up your man cave with as much sports memorabilia as you want. We both know it's where you go to watch porn. --Seth Meyers

People who are obsessed with serial killers, get a real hobby. If you're obsessed with creepy guys and their unsuspecting victims, why not just watch "The Bachelor"? --Seth Meyers

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Just like you ran into Vietnam, Cadet Bone Spurs? (Shut up, we need this!)

You guys, it's Presidents' Day. Happy Presidents' Day, you guys. This morning, President Trump ran downstairs in his pajamas looking for presents under the tree. --Jimmy Fallon

Of course, lots of stores had Presidents' Day sales. In fact, today Trump bought 2,000 miles of mattresses for the border. Well, he saw a deal. That’s sweet. --Jimmy Fallon

Well, you guys, McDonald's shamrock shake is back. Some people said, "Eh, it's a little early." While Americans are like, "Shut up, we need this!" --Jimmy Fallon

Check this out. The other day, a woman gave birth to a baby boy on a JetBlue flight. It was stressful, but now JetBlue can finally say that they had an early arrival. --Jimmy Fallon

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”