Apparently, his bone spurs are retractable, like cat’s claws (but if you want to lick it, it’s a quarter)

I’m going on vacation next week. Donald Trump is planning a vacation, too. On Wednesday, he’s going to Vietnam. Apparently, his bone spurs are retractable, like cat’s claws. --Stephen Colbert

But Trump is going to Vietnam to hold his second summit with North Korean dictator Kim Jong-Un. Seen here on a fun day of apple picking with friends he plans to murder. --Stephen Colbert

The Post Office announced today that it is going to issue a stamp commemorating prostitution in the United States. It’s a ten cent stamp, but if you want to lick it, it’s a quarter. --Chevy Chase, SNL

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”