Their advice, introduce yourself to as many people as possible (The book sells for $25 but for $35 she'll show you)

At the White House this week President Clinton officially came out against same-sex marriages. What's more the president said he is not too crazy about opposite sex marriages either. --Norm Macdonald, SNL

Hollywood prostitute Divine Brown is writing a book describing in lurid detail exactly what she did with Hugh Grant. The book sells for $25 but for $35 she'll show you. --Norm Macdonald, SNL

A new FBI study shows that for the first time Americans are more likely to be killed by a stranger than a loved one or acquaintance. Their advice, introduce yourself to as many people as possible. --Norm Macdonald, SNL

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Top Ten Surprises in the Osama bin Laden Diary (coconut shrimp bites)

"When I heard bin Laden had been killed I went, 'Oh, great. NOW what's Oprah going to do for her last guest?'" –David Letterman

David Letterman's "Top Ten Surprises in the Osama bin Laden Diary" 

10. Always dotted the 'I' in 'Jihad' with a smiley face 

9. Expressed anger at not being invited to the royal wedding

8. Disguised himself by wearing a fake beard over his real beard

7. Was the first one to suggest Hugh Grant as a possible replacement for Charlie Sheen

6. Admitted in college he experimented with a member of the opposite sect

5. Preferred exploding boxers to exploding briefs

4. As much as he hated the United States, he loved Red Lobster's coconut shrimp bites

3. The guy just wouldn't shut up about the new Beastie Boys album

2. Would occasionally fax jokes to Leno

1. Turns out he was kind of a coward

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 

A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

That's my lucky stabbing hat!/for $35 she'll show you/if you want to lick it, it’s a quarter

The Post Office announced today that it is going to issue a stamp commemorating prostitution in the United States. It’s a ten cent stamp, but if you want to lick it, it’s a quarter. --Chevy Chase, SNL

Hollywood prostitute Divine Brown is writing a book describing in lurid detail exactly what she did with Hugh Grant. The book sells for $25 but for $35 she'll show you. --Norm Macdonald, SNL

At the White House this week President Clinton officially came out against same-sex marriages. What's more the president said he is not too crazy about opposite sex marriages either. --Norm Macdonald, SNL

In a brilliant move during closing arguments the O.J. Simpson Attorney, Johnnie Cochran, put on the knit cap prosecutors say OJ wore the night he committed the murders. Although OJ may have hurt his case when he suddenly blurted out, “Hey easy with that! That's my lucky stabbing hat!” --Norm Macdonald, SNL

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 

A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

introduce yourself to as many people as possible/for $35 she'll show you/Here I am!

Hollywood prostitute Divine Brown is writing a book describing in lurid detail exactly what she did with Hugh Grant. The book sells for $25 but for $35 she'll show you. --Norm Macdonald, SNL

At the White House this week President Clinton officially came out against same-sex marriages. What's more the president said he is not too crazy about opposite sex marriages either. --Norm Macdonald, SNL

A new FBI study shows that for the first time Americans are more likely to be killed by a stranger than a loved one or acquaintance. Their advice, introduce yourself to as many people as possible. --Norm Macdonald, SNL

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Number 1 (crimes against the human colon)

Actor Hugh Grant is marrying the mother of his three children. This news comes as a shock to the mother of his four children. --Conan O’Brien

The NYPD is investigating allegations of sexual misconduct against celebrity chef Mario Batali. They’re also investigating Guy Fieri for crimes against the human colon. --Conan O’Brien

A man was arrested for urinating on a seat during a Frontier Airlines flight. It’s the first time anyone has ever associated Frontier Airlines with number one. --Conan O’Brien

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Celebrities Read Mean Tweets #10

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #Bernie2020 #JusticeDemocrats