Facebook is shutting down (Please, please, please be yourself)

Facebook is expanding its campaign to combat online hate speech. In other words, Facebook is shutting down. –Conan O’Brien

Scientists now say life on Earth may have started after an accidental mashup between DNA and RNA. When asked for comment, Larry King said, “That was one crazy weekend, man.” –Conan O’Brien

Before tonight’s debate, President Obama told Hillary Clinton, “Be yourself.” Then Obama told Donald Trump, “Please, please, please be yourself.” –Conan O’Brien