Not GR-R-REAT! (It’s Finger Losin’ Good!)

A drunk woman in Nebraska had to be hospitalized this weekend after she broke into a zoo because she wanted to pet a tiger and wound up being bitten by the animal. When asked how she’s doing, the woman said, “Not GR-R-REAT!” –Seth Meyers

A processing company that supplies chicken to KFC was fined this week after an employee lost two fingertips while on the job. Which explains their new slogan, “It’s Finger Losin’ Good!” –Seth Meyers

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

American Exceptionalism (Not GR-R-REAT!)

The U.S. Air Force announced today their new model of stealth bomber will cost half a billion dollars each. And, even worse, it uses a different charger than the old model. –Seth Meyers

There are just eight days left until the election. So if anyone's still thinking of running, now's the time. –Seth Meyers

A drunk woman in Nebraska had to be hospitalized this weekend after she broke into a zoo because she wanted to pet a tiger and wound up being bitten by the animal. When asked how she’s doing, the woman said, “Not GR-R-REAT!” –Seth Meyers

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Which explains why its first word was “Wazzzzzupppppp!” (Not GR-R-REAT!)

​​A couple in Tennessee recently gave birth to a baby from an embryo that was frozen 24 years ago. Which explains why its first word was “Wazzzzzupppppp!” –Seth Meyers

A drunk woman in Nebraska had to be hospitalized this weekend after she broke into a zoo because she wanted to pet a tiger and wound up being bitten by the animal. When asked how she’s doing, the woman said, “Not GR-R-REAT!” –Seth Meyers

A Canadian pharmacy had to apologize this weekend after accidentally handing out bipolar medication on Halloween instead of candy. The victims say they’re sad that it happened, but happy that it happened. –Seth Meyers

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

It remains illegal to get high in Ohio, which means there is still no legal way to enjoy a Cleveland Browns game (I love this country so much)

Yesterday, more women won their elections and are now going to congress than ever before in history. In response republicans were like, “This isn’t what we meant when we said a woman’s place is in the House.” --James Corden

Donald Trump will be the next president. It was a weird night to be watching the news. If you were flipping around, every news anchor on every channel was just going, “uhhh,” and then going to commercial. –James Corden

In Ohio, people voted on a referendum which would have had to legalize marijuana in that state, but it did not pass. That's right, it remains illegal to get high in Ohio, which means there is still no legal way to enjoy a Cleveland Browns game. –James Corden

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

MLB The Show: Diamondbacks vs Tigers (S14 World Series G 1-5)

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 

A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Well, there's ONE priest whose vow of celibacy will never be questioned (That’s just crude and unnecessary)

A lot of people are getting excited about the pope’s upcoming visit. In fact, I read that a priest in Pennsylvania plans to show off a 500-thousand-piece Lego model of the Vatican that took him two years to build. Well, there's ONE priest whose vow of celibacy will never be questioned. –Jimmy Fallon

“Yeah, the Trump campaign is now selling ‘Fill that seat’ T-shirts. Seriously, someone just passed away and he’s selling T-shirts like they just clinched the American League East. Here’s some advice: if you are wondering how to deal with a job opening when someone dies and you find yourself on a custom T-shirt website, you’ve made a wrong turn. Even long-haul drivers with truck nuts were like, ‘That’s just crude and unnecessary.’” —Jimmy Fallon

President Trump is on the campaign trail. He's spending the night in Las Vegas, which means tomorrow he'll wake up in a hotel room with a tiger, a baby, and a face tattoo. --Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”