Never forget what you're fighting for (3-wood/Smirnoff 100)

Kamala Harris told Rachel Maddow that her race against Trump ended up being the closest presidential election in the 21st century. When asked about proof, she said, “I prefer Smirnoff 100.” —Greg Gutfeld

New York Governor Kathy Hochul was booed by fans when she was brought up on stage at the Ryder Cup Golf Tournament. But the worst moment came when golfers mistook her face for a 3-wood. —Greg Gutfeld

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

They say he is so depressed about this, he hardly has the energy to execute anybody (Hillary, Chelsea and Sinbad)

"Rick Perry has dropped 20 points in the polls in one week. They

say he is so depressed about this, he hardly has the energy to

execute anybody." –Bill Maher

 

"There is a little discrepancy about what happened on this hunt, because Ann Armstrong, the woman who has this ranch, said there was no alcohol involved, and Dick Cheney said he had one beer. So apparently, Dick Cheney can't keep his rifle, his story, or his daughter straight." --Bill Maher

"In Iraq the fighting, apparently, is so fierce and the bullets are flying so fast and furious, they might have to pull the Marines out and send in Hillary, Chelsea and Sinbad." --Bill Maher

 

"I watched this speech. It is so infuriating the way Bush has a way of getting religion on issues that he has been resisting forever, and then he acts like he thought of it and we're the a-------. This government must stop spending money we don't have! He actually had the nerve to say, 'For the sake of the environment, we got to use less oil. Some dips--- has been dragging his feet on global warming around here. When I find out who's in that guy's body, I'm going to f--- him up.'" --Bill Maher

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

A remarkable capacity for not even hearing about them (It’s called leadership, people)

August 2022

“There was an extraordinary excerpt from yet another book on the Trump White House. According to an excerpt published in the New Yorker from The Divider: Trump in the White House, by Peter Baker and Susan Glasser, Trump complained to his chief of staff John Kelly, a former Marine Corps general: ‘You fucking generals, why can’t you be like the German generals?’  That’s right, Fox News was out there every day being like, ‘these liberals are so over the top, always comparing Trump to Hitler.’ Meanwhile, Trump was going ‘why won’t people treat me more like Hitler? Why not?’ It actually got more alarming than that, because Kelly reportedly pointed out that Hitler was almost assassinated three times by his military leaders. Trump replied: ‘No, no, no, they were totally loyal to him.’ I don’t know why, but I feel like that information didn’t change Trump’s opinion of the German generals. Knowing Trump, he was probably like, ‘Those losers tried to kill Hitler three times and they choked like a dog … you know who was able to kill Hitler on the first try? Hitler. It’s called leadership, people.’” —Trevor Noah

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

At least the manager of a paintball range has some leadership skills (Better known as Jets-level)

February 2021

I know there are bigger things happening in the world but can we take about Ted Cruz’s hair for about an hour. What happened here? It looks like he’s selling fireworks out of the back of an El Camino. I’m pretty sure I’ve seen this guy handcuffed crying on a curb in COPS. What are you doing, man? You’re a senator. Not the manager of a paintball range. At least the manager of a paintball range has some leadership skills. —Colin Jost

New York governor Andrew Cuomo announced that he will allow sporting venues to open starting February 23, but limit them to 10% of capacity. Better known as Jets-level. —Colin Jost

A Marine base in California revealed that 10 pounds of C-4 explosives has gone missing from the facility. So it’s either a domestic terror plot or someone’s having a gender reveal party. —Colin Jost

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html

“A poet that belongs with the Masters. A magisterial collection. A combination of 

Bukowski’s The Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.” 

 

Zombie, lesbian, disappeared, inflatable (Especially the really hot ones)

"The Marine Corps’ top general suggested allowing gay soldiers on the battlefield would pose a distraction. Especially the really hot ones." –Conan O'Brien

"The Golden Globes will have an unusual category this year: 'Outstanding Performance by an Animal Killed by Sarah Palin.'" –David Letterman

"Larry King has been married more times than Henry the Eighth. We used to have that rhyme to keep track of them. 'Divorced, beheaded, died. Divorced, beheaded, survived.' With Larry I think it goes, 'Divorced, beheaded, divorced, escaped. Zombie, lesbian, disappeared, inflatable.'" –Craig Ferguson

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

It would have been bigger, but it was really cold outside (writes a check to Barbie, and then calls her “Horseface.”)

Over the weekend, Donald Trump joined dozens of other world leaders in France to commemorate the 100th anniversary of the end of World War I. Just to be safe, Trump brought a note from his doctor saying he absolutely couldn’t fight. --James Corden

There’s a new Christmas toy being advertised on Fox News. It’s Trumpy Bear! It’s pretty realistic. If you press his paw, Trumpy Bear even writes a check to Barbie, and then calls her “Horseface.” --James Corden

Two Marine Corps pilot were grounded when they flew their jets and left smoke trails in the sky that looked like a penis and testicles. When questioned the Marines said, “It would have been bigger, but it was really cold outside.” --John Hulse

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

George W. Bush highlight reel (Wanna See It Again?)

This is a true story: For his secretary of defense, Donald Trump has chosen a retired Marine general whose nickname is Mad Dog. So sleep well, America! –Conan O’Brien

It’s been reported that President-elect Trump has chosen four-star Gen. James Mattis for secretary of defense. When Trump was told the general had four stars, he said, “Wow, that’s a great Yelp review.” –Conan O’Brien

Mitt Romney is being mocked by many Republicans for going to a fancy French dinner with Donald Trump. It’s also not helping that afterwards, Romney let Trump get to third base. –Conan O’Brien

The CEO of Starbucks announced he’s stepping down. He’s going to become the CEO of the Starbucks across the street. –Conan O’Brien