Madden: Indianapolis Colts vs Kansas City Chiefs (Overtime-Touchdowns)

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

 “A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.” 

 

Madden: Indianapolis Colts vs Kansas City Chiefs (Overtime)

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

I’m rooting for the Chiefs, just for the record (I only had to ask every day for two years)

“You can tell Obama’s endorsement meant a lot to Joe Biden. Right after, he was like, ‘I know you guys really love me because I only had to ask every day for two years.” —Jimmy Fallon

“I like how Obama endorsed Biden now. That’s like waiting until there’s one second left in the Super Bowl and saying ‘OK, I’m rooting for the Chiefs, just for the record.’” —Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Everyone gets that, right? (I only had to ask every day for two years)

“You can tell Obama’s endorsement meant a lot to Biden. Right after, he was like, ‘I know you guys really love me because I only had to ask every day for two years.” —Jimmy Fallon

“I like how Obama endorsed Biden now. That’s like waiting until there’s one second left in the Super Bowl and saying ‘OK, I’m rooting for the Chiefs, just for the record.’” —Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Madden: Indianapolis Colts vs Kansas City Chiefs

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

I guess that means neither got a ring (The last thing you want is teachers getting pregnant)

Travis Kelce didn't propose to Taylor Swift on the their recent romantic getaway. I guess that means neither got a ring. —Greg Gutfeld

Parents in Maryland are outraged at a new bill that would make condoms available in school vending machines. I get it. The last thing you want is teachers getting pregnant. —Greg Gutfeld

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Madden: Philadelphia Eagles vs Kansas City Chiefs (Super Bowl)

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

Yeah, well, 179 if we take over Canada by Saturday (Taylor Swift’s boyfriend)

“Yeah, between the game and the commercials, it’s going to be four straight hours of Patrick Mahomes on TV.” — Jimmy Fallon

“Taylor Swift will also be in attendance to support her boyfriend, the Chiefs’ superstar tight end, Taylor Swift’s boyfriend.” — Stephen Colbert

“I saw that this year’s Super Bowl will be watched in 180 countries. Yeah, well, 179 if we take over Canada by Saturday.” — Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Madden: Kansas City Chiefs vs Baltimore Ravens

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

you’re embarrassing me in front of my girlfriend, jeez louise! (Finally, something good happened for Taylor Swift!)

In case you missed it, the Kansas City Chiefs beat the San Francisco 49ers, 25-22, in overtime. Finally, something good happened for Taylor Swift! —Stephen Colbert

It was a low-scoring first half – at one point, the Chiefs seemed close to scoring their first touchdown, only to fumble the ball. Travis Kelce was caught on camera yelling at his coach Andy Reid, which I lip-read as ‘you’re embarrassing me in front of my girlfriend, jeez louise!’ —Stephen Colbert

The NFL avoided many shots of Swift during the game, but at one point caught her chugging her beer. Have fun, Taylor, but please make sure you have a designated driver for your private jet. The NFL tweeted a picture of the moment with the word “icon”. If that’s what makes you an icon, then my Aunt Rita is an icon-aholic. —Stephen Colbert

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Trump’s dancing like nobody’s checking IDs (Time)

Well, just hours ago, President Biden won the South Carolina primary barely edging out his closest rival. Time. —Colin Jost

As you may have seen on your aunt’s Facebook, many MAGA personalities are claiming that the Super Bowl is being rigged so that Kansas City wins and Taylor Swift can come on to the field with Travis Kelce and endorse Joe Biden. MAGA people have so many enemies to keep track of, you have to hate the NFL, Taylor Swift, Bud Light, Disney, Kristen Stewart for some reason, electric stoves, windmills, the concept of rainbows, and the green M&M. And you have to think that everybody in the government is a secret pedophile except for Trump when he danced with Jeffrey Epstein. I mean, isn’t that the happiest you’ve ever seen Trump? Trump’s dancing like nobody’s checking IDs. —Colin Jost

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

ratings are going to be higher than Snoop Dogg at a Willie Nelson concert (not-too-Swifties)

“There are so many questions about this Super Bowl: can the 49ers contain Patrick Mahomes? Can the Chiefs stop Christian McCaffrey? And the one that most people care about: can Taylor Swift make it there because she has a concert in Japan the day before?! Between the Super Bowl and Swift, he added, ratings are going to be higher than Snoop Dogg at a Willie Nelson concert.” —Jimmy Fallon

Supporters of former President Donald Trump are spreading conspiracy theories about the Super Bowl, Travis Kelce of the Kansas City Chiefs and his girlfriend, Taylor Swift. Even this clown who ran for president, Vivek Ramaswamy, added his nut voice to the chorus of cuckoos. He pointed to the former G.O.P. candidate’s suggestion that Kelce and Swift were “an artificially culturally propped-up couple” and that the Super Bowl would be rigged, all to get President Biden re-elected. And it’s not just on Twitter — this nonsense is now everywhere your angry grandpa goes, I’m calling the conspiracy theorists, the “not-too-Swifties.” —Jimmy Kimmel

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

I regret nothing (Well, congrats on the payday, Eric.)

There is speculation over whether Taylor Swift would attend the Super Bowl now that her beau Travis Kelce will be playing for the Kansas City Chiefs, who take on the San Francisco 49ers in Las Vegas in two weeks. The whole thing has been great for the NFL and for dads who struggle to bond with their teenage daughters. Swift mania has fully taken over the NFL, he noted, as American Airlines announced it would rename the flight from Kansas City to Las Vegas for the game to AA1989, in honor of Swift’s album and also the last year they checked the bolts on that plane. — Stephen Colbert

It’s still unclear whether the pop star will be able to attend the game, as she is scheduled to perform a concert in Tokyo the day before. It’s just too stressful! Why can’t she just do a concert closer, like Paris or Venice or New York? They’re all there, in Vegas. Of course, I hope Taylor makes it, because I really want to watch the Apple Music Super Bowl Half-time Show starring Shaky Footage of Taylor Swift Cheering in a Skybox, featuring Usher. — Stephen Colbert

In other news, a New York jury ordered Donald Trump to pay a whopping $83.3m to E Jean Carroll for defamation. The former columnist promised to ‘give the money to something Donald Trump hates’. Well, congrats on the payday, Eric.  — Stephen Colbert

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

She did some charity over the weekend by shining a spotlight on a little, unknown sport called football (You can’t win ’em all. Or any of them)

“Let’s ease into everything with some sports news, and by sports news, I mean Taylor Swift: America’s sweetheart. She did some charity over the weekend by shining a spotlight on a little, unknown sport called football.” — Desus Nice

“Also, props to Brittany Mahomes. She leveled up. She went from being the quarterback’s wife to Taylor Swift’s B.F.F. — that’s like the highest level a white woman can get.” — Desus Nice

“I will say it’s a good thing Taylor is dating someone on a good team. If she was dating someone on the Jets, she wouldn’t have a touchdown handshake. She’d just have a reassuring shoulder tap: ‘We’ll get ’em next time. You can’t win ’em all. Or any of them.’” — Desus Nice

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.” 

 

That is one anger-glazed ham (the first to end world hunger)

“We looked at the calendar today and — check my math on this — I believe we have been off the air for 154 indictments. And, of course, Donald Trump’s mugshot for a third indictment in Georgia. That is one anger-glazed ham.” — Stephen Colbert

“Taylor Swift is potentially dating the Kansas City Chiefs tight-end Travis Kelce, after she was seen cheering him on at two Sunday games in a row. This is all great publicity for the NFL. Mere rumors that Tay-Tay might be at last night’s game-game sent ticket prices surging more than 40%. It used to be that you couldn’t afford to watch Taylor Swift. Now you can’t afford to watch Taylor Swift watch something.” — Stephen Colbert

“But the Swift Lift is not limited to tickets. Her maybe-boyfriend’s jersey saw a 400% spike in sales, and the jean shorts she was wearing are now sold out everywhere. Everything she touches is instantly revitalized, which gives me an idea: Taylor, if this relationship doesn’t work out, is there any way you can start dating one of our nation’s crumbling bridges?” — Stephen Colbert

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Madden 2K23: Indianapolis Colts vs Kansas City Chiefs (PS5)

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

Madden: Kansas City Chiefs vs Philadelphia Eagles (Super Bowl)

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

Even Tom Brady is like, ‘Hey, give someone else a chance.’ (Masters of War)

January 2023

“Guys, I want to say congrats to the Kansas City Chiefs and the Philadelphia Eagles on advancing to Super Bowl LVII. Yeah, to all Chiefs fans, I want to say congratulations. To all the Eagles fans, I want to say good morning. You could tell Philly partied hard last night because today, the Rocky statue is holding up Tylenol and a Gatorade.” —Jimmy Fallon

“Of course, everyone in Kansas City is just as pumped. This is the Chiefs' third Super Bowl appearance in the last four years. Even Tom Brady is like, ‘Hey, give someone else a chance.’” —Jimmy Fallon

“Meanwhile, before becoming coach of the Chiefs, Andy Reid was head coach of the Eagles for 14 years. He looks just the same as he did then. I don't know how this is possible, but somehow, Andy Reid is the Paul Rudd of the NFL.” —Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Madden: Kansas City Chiefs vs Jacksonville Jaguars

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

Where do I see myself in five years? (13%)

February 2022

“Looking into the lawsuit against the NFL by former Miami Dolphins coach Brian Flores for racial discrimination. Now, sure, almost 70% of NFL players are Black, and there’s only one Black head coach in the entire league, but the NFL can’t be racist! They spray-painted a tiny ‘end racism’ next to the Kansas City Chiefs logo!” —Stephen Colbert

“Flores was fired by Miami on 10 January, despite leading the team to its first back-to-back winning seasons since 2003. Despite his overall record, winning seven of his last eight games this season, Flores was fired, apparently because he did not get along and go along with the owner. But eight other teams also lost their coaches, and Flores got several interviews for open positions, including with the New York Giants. Such coaching searches are bound by the NFL’s ‘Rooney Rule’, which requires NFL teams to interview a diverse range of candidates for head coaching jobs and other leadership positions. It’s a great idea, gives everybody an opportunity, unless you don’t give an opportunity to anybody, which is what happened in this case. Flores learned via mistaken text from Bill Belichick, the New England Patriots coach, that the head coaching job had gone to someone else – three days before his interview with the team. So he’s saying they wasted his time just to check a pretend box about how they pretend care about diversity, though I imagine it did take the pressure off the job interview – ‘Where do I see myself in five years? Uh, I don’t know, suing you?’” —Stephen Colbert

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/12/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and_10.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”