Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned (invisibility cloaks)

Last night, "The Young Pope" premiered on HBO. You can tell this pope is young because when people say, "Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned." He just goes, "Kay." –Jimmy Fallon

The Harry Potter Studio Tour just announced that it's hosting a Valentine's Day dinner in the Great Hall from Hogwarts. It's great for couples, or for single guys who claim their date is wearing an “invisibility cloak.” –Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

there’s a good chance President Biden did, too (You guys need anything?)

“That’s right, Tom Suozzi is replacing George Santos, and just from looking at their resumes, the two of them are pretty different. For instance, under education, Suozzi put, ‘B.A. from Boston College.’ Santos put, ‘Ph.D. from Hogwarts.’” — Jimmy Fallon

“That’s right, today is Valentine’s Day, and if you forgot, don’t worry, there’s a good chance President Biden did, too.” — Jimmy Fallon

Following his historic removal from Congress, George Santos’ district on Long Island held a special election for his replacement this week, and voters had nothing but negative things to say about him. To quote one voter: “I think he needs help because he’s delusional.” And when a Long Islander says you’re delusional it stings, because they’re mostly Jets fans. —Seth Meyers

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Looks like the student has become the mustard! (invisibility cloak)

The Harry Potter Studio Tour just announced that it's hosting a Valentine's Day dinner in the Great Hall from Hogwarts. It's great for couples, or for single guys who claim their date is wearing an “invisibility cloak.” –Jimmy Fallon

Jeb Bush was talking about the Obamas yesterday and mispronounced their daughter Malia's name, and it sounded like he said “Malala.” Then his brother George was like, "Heh — looks like the student has become the mustard!” –Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Yeah, the judge called the case “not why I went to law school.” (their date is wearing an invisibility cloak)

The Harry Potter Studio Tour just announced that it's hosting a Valentine's Day dinner in the Great Hall from Hogwarts. It's great for couples, or for single guys who claim their date is wearing an “invisibility cloak.” –Jimmy Fallon

"Yesterday the Denver Broncos and the Seattle Seahawks advanced to the big game, which means this year’s Super Bowl will have teams from the two states where recreational marijuana is legal. Or as pizza delivery men put it, 'Pray for us.'" –Jimmy Fallon

Kylie Minogue won a legal battle against Kylie Jenner over the trademark of the name “Kylie.” Yeah, the judge called the case “not why I went to law school.” –Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

I'm starting to wonder if she ever really went to Hogwarts (Divide and Conquer Strategy)

"Today we found out that a third college that Christine O'Donnell said she attended has no record of ever knowing her. I'm starting to wonder if she ever really went to Hogwarts." –Bill Maher

"Meg Whitman is running on a platform that's tough on illegal immigration. We found out this week she had an illegal immigrant working in her house for nine years. Today she's willing to take a lie detector test to prove that she didn't know that she had an illegal alien cleaning her house. If we wanted a governor who swears they have no idea what's happening in their house, we'd move to Alaska." –Bill Maher

"It's not that easy to go and secure all these chemical weapons. For one thing, the Syrians have been scattering stockpiles of chemical weapons all over. They've even got some stored here in the U.S. It's called Monsanto." –Bill Maher

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

confusion over the First Amendment (acknowledging evolution)

"Last night on 'Dancing With the Stars,' Bristol Palin came out dressed in a gorilla costume. They say this is the closest a member of the Palin family has ever come to acknowledging evolution.” –Jimmy Kimmel

“How can you not know about the separation of church and state? Someone get this woman a copy of Schoolhouse Rock because this is ridiculous. Apparently they don’t teach the Constitution at Hogwarts.” –Jimmy Kimmel, on Christine O'Donnell's confusion over the First Amendment

"Apparently the Octomom still has 29 frozen embryos, which is almost enough to give one to each Chilean miner. I think it’s time for President Obama to build a border fence around the Octomom’s uterus." –Jimmy Kimmel

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

I'm starting to wonder if she ever really went to Hogwarts (masturbation prevention act of 2012)

"Today we found out that a third college that Christine O'Donnell said she attended has no record of ever knowing her. I'm starting to wonder if she ever really went to Hogwarts." –Bill Maher

"I feel bad for my part in this, and then the feeling passes when I imagine her in the Senate introducing the masturbation prevention act of 2012." –Bill Maher

"Meg Whitman, our own candidate for governor of California, is running on a platform that's as tough as nails on illegal immigration. We found out this week she had an illegal immigrant working in her house for nine years. Today Meg Whitman said she's willing to take a lie detector test to prove that she didn't know that she had an illegal alien cleaning her house. You know what, if we wanted a governor who swears they have no idea what's happening in their house, we'd move to Alaska." –Bill Maher

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Bush thought he was meeting the professor from the Hogwarts school (the planting of bugs)

"Yesterday at Camp David, President Bush signed a bill into law that expands his wiretapping powers. President Bush said he knew the bill would pass because he had bugs planted in both houses of Congress." --Jay Leno

  

"Today in Washington, President Bush met with the president of Afghanistan, who was wearing that hat and the robe. President Bush was a little confused. He thought he was meeting the professor from the Hogwarts school." --Jay Leno

     

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #JohnHulsecollectedpoems #Bernie2020 #repealreplacerepublicans

Their dates are wearing an “invisibility cloak.”

This morning, Twitter went down for almost three hours. It wasn’t good — in fact, I heard Donald Trump actually had to FAX his insults to people. –Jimmy Fallon

Donald Trump continues to lead in the polls, but he recently said that if he loses the election, he'd go back to building skyscrapers. When asked where he'd build them, he said, “Right in front of the White House.” –Jimmy Fallon

At a recent town hall meeting, Chris Christie admitted that he's got a little bit of a crush on Adele. Which explains Adele’s new song: “Hell-no.” –Jimmy Fallon

The Harry Potter Studio Tour just announced that it's hosting a Valentine's Day dinner in the Great Hall from Hogwarts. It's great for couples, or for single guys who claim their date is wearing an “invisibility cloak.” –Jimmy Fallon