the landmark New York City case of, Shut Up vs. No, You Shut Up (Stake through the Heart)

"People in New York are especially excited by Judge Sotomayor because she comes from the Bronx. In fact, Judge Sotomayor famously presided over the landmark New York City case, Shut Up vs. No, You Shut Up." --Conan O'Brien

"President Obama has another nominee in the news. That's right. President Obama's nominee for surgeon general is a doctor who practices in rural Alabama and still makes house calls. Can you believe that? Of course, in Alabama, a house call is when the patients drive their house to you." --Conan O'Brien

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Fixing Elections? That's not Russia's Job (That is the Job of the DNC)

"Starting today, the New York Times reduced the size of their newspaper. They cut the paper's width by an inch and a half. The move was announced with the headline 'Big Changes At New York Tim.'" --Conan O'Brien

"Archaeologists in Hungary say they have discovered a forest of trees that's 8 million years old. The archaeologists say that they haven't seen wood that old since the last time Larry King watched porn." --Conan O'Brien

    

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #JohnHulsecollectedpoems #Bernie2020 #repealreplacerepublicans

I Won't Shut Up! (Pillow Fort One)

"Let's begin tonight with news from the Bush family retreat in Kennebunkport, Maine. Or, as the president calls it, Pillow Fort One. Where, over the weekend, newly-minted French President Nicolas Sarkozy was invited to join the president and first lady. Fortunately, the two leaders seemed to hit it off quite well. All the president had to do was try not to live down to the worst stereotypes of Americans [on screen: Bush saying, 'We're going to give him a hamburger and hot dog, his choice']. Actually, it could have been worse. The president actually wanted lunchables." --Jon Stewart

      

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #books #Bernie2020 #repealreplacerepublicans

Trump has announced a temporary ban on all mayors (Hacks or Leaks)

Trump's turned on yet another Republican. At this point there are now fewer people on the Trump bus than there are under it. Trump said that Gillespie never embraced him. The problem is not that Ed Gillespie never embraced Trump. The problem is that Trump's father never embraced Donald Trump. –James Corden

If you felt in the past 12 months — which many of us have, loads of us have — that the country is going backyards, last night I felt that we were all given a little bit of hope because minority candidates had some historic wins nationwide. Like for instance, Hoboken, New Jersey, elected its first Sikh mayor. Helena, Montana, elected the first black mayor in the state's history. Seattle elected its first lesbian mayor. And in response to this, Trump has announced a temporary ban on all mayors. –James Corden

      

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #books #Bernie2020 #repealreplacerepublicans

Bruce Willis is not going to show up to save us (best case scenario)

Starting, as we often do, with President Trump, who has been in Asia for four days: Still no mushroom cloud, so that's a positive. --Jimmy Kimmel

But Trump is not in Asia to eat. He is there to neutralize the threat. He said, “Ultimately, it will all work out. It always works out.” Yeah, right. In the movies. Let's face it. Bruce Willis is not going to show up to save us. Best case, Dennis Rodman shows up to save us. --Jimmy Kimmel

      

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #books #Bernie2020 #repealreplacerepublicans

Donna Brazile: The Vampire Killer! (Japan, my favorite part of China)

Trump was in Japan yesterday and plans to also visit Korea, China, Vietnam, and the Philippines — or as Trump calls them, China. “Japan, my favorite part of China.” –James Corden

During their meeting, President Trump and Japanese Prime Minister Shinzo Abe exchanged signed baseball caps. And this is real: On the baseball caps it said “Donald & Shinzo Make Alliance Even Greater.” Which sounds like the title of an American buddy cop movie after they translate it into Japanese. –James Corden

      

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #books #Bernie2020 #repealreplacerepublicans

a two-bedroom condo in Moscow (Ulysses S. Grant)

People have recently discovered a property that Paul Manafort listed on Airbnb. Of course, it’s not helping Manafort that it’s a two-bedroom condo in Moscow. –Conan O’Brien

President Trump’s press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders confirmed that no one in President Trump’s administration supports slavery. To put that in perspective, the last press secretary who had to make that statement worked for Ulysses S. Grant. –Conan O’Brien

     

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #books #Bernie2020 #repealreplacerepublicans

Debbie, why did you do that to Bernie? (knife in back)

Mark one’s calendar because Election Day is but one week away. Seven days. Enough time to tell your family you love them and make your peace with God. As the captain of the “Titanic” once said, “This is not a drill.” –Stephen Colbert

The polls are tightening. The latest ABC News/ Washington Post poll has Donald Trump moving ahead of Hillary Clinton by one point as enthusiasm declines. Though, to be fair, any time Trump gets close to a woman, enthusiasm tends to decline. –Stephen Colbert

For the first time in their 111-year history, Variety has endorsed a presidential candidate — Hillary Clinton. That’s right, the magazine named Variety said, “Let’s have a second President Clinton!” –Stephen Colbert

Democratic contributor Donna Brazile has resigned from CNN after WikiLeaks revealed she leaked a primary debate question to the Clinton campaign. Turns out the question was about lead poisoning in Flint, Michigan. So, finally, someone lost their job over Flint. –Stephen Colbert