"A Texas paper is
reporting that lobbyist Jack Abramoff charged a client $25,000 to have lunch
with President Bush. Not surprisingly, this is the most anyone has ever payed
for lunch at Chuck E. Cheese." --Conan O'Brien
"A tape was broadcast
on Al Jazeera that is reportedly the first message from Osama bin Laden in over
a year. Experts think it may not be a new tape because in the background you
can hear 'Who Let The Dogs Out,' and he's wearing super-low jeans."
--Conan O'Brien
"Al Jazeera has
released an audiotape from Osama bin Laden. State Department officials say it
shows he’s aware of world events. It opens up congratulating Brad and Angelina
on their baby." --Jay Leno
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