This is good news for every single show except Dog the Bounty Hunter (nut allergies)

"Yesterday, North Korea held its annual marathon. Congratulations to first, second and third place winner, Kim Jong Un." –Conan O'Brien

We're here in San Diego for Comic-Con. Comic-Con is the only place where you can meet a Superman whose kryptonite is his nut allergy. –Conan O’Brien

Scientists are predicting that in a few years we'll be able to smell the TV shows we watch. This is good news for every single show except "Dog the Bounty Hunter." --Conan O’Brien

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

This is a witch — oh, wait a minute, OK. (Task failed successfully)

In Virginia this weekend, Donald Trump walked on stage to a recording of the national anthem by the “J6 prison choir” of incarcerated insurrectionists. Man, these Trump rallies are fucking weird. They’re like half mega-church and half Comic-Con but with way worse merch. —Seth Meyers

“That’s right, the Supreme Court ruled that states cannot keep Trump off their ballots, which means that the Supreme Court remains the only place where Trump can win the popular vote.” — Seth Meyers

“Speaking of former President Trump, today the Supreme Court unanimously ruled that Colorado is not allowed to remove him from the 2024 ballot. Then out of habit, Trump immediately appealed the decision. He’s like, ‘This is a witch — oh, wait a minute, OK.’” — Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

unfortunately all the people who know how to fix it are here at Comic-Con (the other option)

The New York Stock Exchange was shut down today for four hours due to a technical glitch. They would have fixed it sooner but unfortunately all the people who know how are here at Comic-Con. –Conan O’Brien

"Televangelist Pat Robertson said he wishes Facebook had a 'vomit button' he could push whenever someone posts a picture of a gay couple kissing. Of course, the other option would be for Pat Robertson to stop searching online for gay men kissing." –Conan O'Brien

It seems like every business in San Diego jacks up their prices this week. It's gotten so bad the NFL team has changed its name to the San Diego Overchargers. –Conan O’Brien

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.” 

 

the only place where you can meet a Superman whose kryptonite is his nut allergy (My Bullsh*t)

"The group MoveOn.org has called on John McCain to release all of his medical records. In response, McCain told them, 'Why don't you just come down to the warehouse and look around for yourself? Bring a forklift, it'll take time.'" --Conan O'Brien

We're here in San Diego for Comic-Con. Comic-Con is the only place where you can meet a Superman whose kryptonite is his nut allergy. –Conan O’Brien

"This week, John McCain was endorsed by the gay group known as the Log Cabin Republicans. That's true, yeah. They endorsed McCain not so much because he supports gay rights, but because he was actually born in a log cabin." --Conan O'Brien

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Who needs that many guns in their rec room? (Giving the flag the clap)

February 2021

The Conservative Political Action Conference theme for this year’s conference is America Uncanceled.

“I didn’t know America was canceled. Although, I’m not surprised — the last season was pretty unbelievable.” —Stephen Colbert

“It’s like Comic-Con for neo-cons and neo-Nazis, too.” —Jimmy Kimmel

“It’s a who’s who of ‘Who needs that many guns in their rec room?’” —Stephen Colbert

“Still, better than last year’s CPAC theme: ‘Giving the flag the clap.’” —Stephen Colbert

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html

“A poet that belongs with the Masters. A magisterial collection. A combination of 

Bukowski’s The Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.” 

 

Which proved that the pen is mightier than the light saber (It's like waiting for the next Harry Potter)

"The founder of WikiLeaks just released 91,000 classified documents about the war in Afghanistan, and he said he plans to post thousands more. I just wish he'd hurry, because I breezed through those first 91,000. It's like waiting for the next Harry Potter." –Jimmy Fallon

"BP will replace Tony Hayward as CEO. He plans to spend more time at home spilling every liquid in his kitchen cabinet." –Jimmy Kimmel

"Violence struck at Comic-Con when an argument between two men resulted in one being arrested for stabbing the other with a pen. Which proved that the pen is mightier than the light saber." –Jimmy Kimmel

"There were 80,000 guys dressed as superheroes and no one stepped in to save him." –Jimmy Kimmel

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Wall Street has to wait an hour after eating to go swimming (and other forms of birth control)

"President Obama signed into law a sweeping financial reform. The law started out strong, but got watered down as it went through Congress. Basically, the law now says that Wall Street has to wait an hour after eating to go swimming." –Jimmy Kimmel

"The big comic book convention, Comic-Con, starts tomorrow in San Diego. This is a week-long convention of comic books, science fiction, video games, and other forms of birth control." –Jimmy Fallon

"British Prime Minister David Cameron is visiting the U.S. and yesterday he and President Obama gave each other pieces of art. That really wasn't necessary, Britain. You've already given us a huge oil painting." –Jimmy Fallon

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

We have the cast of "Game of Thrones" tonight.

Comic-Con has officially banned selfie sticks and e-cigarettes, which is too bad. Because now when I see someone smoking an e-cigarette, I have nothing to beat them with. –Conan O’Brien

We have the cast of "Game of Thrones" tonight. I went to see them in the green room. They're all dead. –Conan O’Brien

Superman has a nut allergy

We're here in San Diego for Comic-Con. Comic-Con is the only place where you can meet a Superman whose kryptonite is his nut allergy. –Conan O’Brien

It seems like every business in San Diego jacks up their prices this week. It's gotten so bad the NFL team has changed its name to the San Diego Overchargers. –Conan O’Brien

The New York Stock Exchange was shut down today for four hours due to a technical glitch. They would have fixed it sooner but unfortunately all the people who know how are here at Comic-Con. –Conan O’Brien