I don’t agree with Trump on much, but yeah, they screwed you (Dave’s weird friend)

“Trump has fully turned Canada – yeah, that Canada – into an enemy. He’s threatening military force to annex Greenland, he signed an order directing his vice-president to remove ‘wokeness’ from the National Zoo and he’s mad about a portrait at the Colorado state capitol that isn’t sufficiently flattering. On that last point, I don’t agree with Trump on much, but yeah, they fucked you.” —Seth Meyers

National security adviser Mike Waltz’s played the blame game for the Signal group chat used to discuss sensitive military plans for strikes in Yemen. Speaking to Fox News, Waltz claimed that the number for Jeffrey Goldberg, The Atlantic editor he invited to the chat, just got “sucked in” to his phone. It just got ‘sucked in’ is a terrible answer when your title is national security adviser. It’s not even a good answer if your title is Dave’s weird friend. —Seth Meyers

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

If we lose Dave Nugget and Mark Filet-O-Fish, I’m a goner (Pop Secret)

No one is buying the administration’s excuses, not even congressional Republicans such as the Nebraska lawmaker Don Bacon, who said: “I think it’s classified. They’re digging themselves a bigger hole and I would implore the secretary of defense and others, just own it.” Trump cannot be happy about this. [Colbert as Trump]: “OK, we’ve lost Don Bacon, this just got real. If we lose Dave Nugget and Mark Filet-O-Fish, I’m a goner.” —Stephen Colbert

“This scandal won’t be going away any time soon because Mike Waltz has made a key strategic error: being an idiot everywhere, at all times. Wired reported that Waltz kept his Venmo friends list public, including fellow senior staff, journalists, a tailor and doctors. He’s Venmoing his doctor? My man, if your doctor takes Venmo, that ain’t a doctor. Worse, the German newspaper Der Spiegel reported that senior Trump officials’ mobile phone numbers, email addresses and passwords were easily available online, including for Waltz and the secretary of defense, Pete Hegseth. These are our highest-ranking security officials! I don’t think we should trust these people with anything top secret. Hell, I don’t think we should trust these people with anything Pop Secret.” —Stephen Colbert

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Apparently theres a party on Isle 15 (don’t send out an e-vite for Fight Club)

Numerous intelligence officials are agog at the SignalGate scandal; one posted on X: “My junior analysts know not to do this. Yes, everyone understands this! The characters in Fight Club understand this! It’s why the first rule of Fight Club is don’t send out an e-vite for Fight Club. —Stephen Colbert

Michael Waltz, Trump’s national security adviser, who invited Jeffrey Goldberg to the Signal chat, tried to defend himself in an interview with Fox News’s Laura Ingraham, at once taking responsibility and claiming that Goldberg’s number was “somehow sucked in” to his phone. “It gets sucked in?” OK, so you’re discussing military secrets on an app that’s so insecure that the numbers of people you’ve never spoken to just get sucked in, and then that person is part of the chat? Well, something sucks, but I don’t think it’s the numbers. —Stephen Colbert

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

She's even been contacted by Bill Clinton about an internship (Nancy Pelosi was seen fleeing the country)

A California woman with the world's longest tongue says being a Guinness record holder has provided her with career opportunities. She's even been contacted by Bill Clinton about an internship. —Greg Gutfeld

Elon Musk said Doge's next target will be members of Congress who got strangely wealthy. Upon hearing the news Nancy Pelosi was seen fleeing the country. —Greg Gutfeld

In a New York Times essay Hillary Clinton calls the Trump administration dumb over the Signal chat leak. She added quote "If it were me they would have already found Mike Waltz dead in a prison cell." —Greg Gutfeld

A new study says masturbation can improve the quality of sleep and furthermore … Zzzzzzzzzzz. —Greg Gutfeld

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”