Well to give you some idea, at the party they had two cakes (Meal or No Meal)

The American Academy of Pediatrics has released an updated list of unsafe baby products. Topping the list this year is the really really really really high chair. --Norm Macdonald, SNL

The richest girl in the world, billionaire Athina Onassis celebrated her 10th birthday this week. What's it like to be the richest girl in the world? Well to give you some idea, at the party they had two cakes. --Norm Macdonald, SNL

“There are seven modeling shows on television right now. There’s America’s Next Top Model which I like to call, Meal or No Meal.”—David Spade

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

I want to make sure Ukraine has enough tanks before I get my colonoscopy (Green for the greater good)

"My mother never breastfed me. She always had a headache."--Rodney Dangerfield

"I drink too much. I gave the doctor a urine sample and there was an olive in it."--Rodney Dangerfield

Why do dogs race to the door when you when the doorbell rings? It’s almost never for them. --Norm Macdonald

“There are seven modeling shows on television right now. There’s America’s Next Top Model which I like to call, Meal or No Meal.”—David Spade

“I want to make sure Ukraine has enough tanks before I get my colonoscopy.” –Kurt Metzger 1/26/2023

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

How about we take this to the bedroom (trips to the graveyard with the hunchbacked assistant)

“Dick Cheney was talking to a reporter right after the surgery and he said he wants to live long enough to make sure nobody else gets healthcare.” –David Letterman

“Over the weekend they gave Dick Cheney a heart transplant. Finally all of those midnight trips to the graveyard with the hunchbacked assistant have paid off.” –David Letterman

“Newt Gingrich's campaign is broke. All the money gone. So now he's charging $50 for a photo. And for $100 you can marry him.” –David Letterman

A woman in Utah survived after her SUV got stuck in the snow and mud for nearly a week. The woman said she couldn’t have made it without her children. Her delicious, delicious children. --Michael Che, SNL

“There are seven modeling shows on television right now. There’s America’s Next Top Model which I like to call, Meal or No Meal.”—David Spade

Why do dogs race to the door when you when the doorbell rings? It’s almost never for them. --Norm Macdonald

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

you’ll have to watch a flight attendant duct tape a drunk guy to his seat (four new variants)

August 2021

“The 2020 Tokyo Olympics ended yesterday, and the U.S. athletes brought home 39 gold medals, 41 silvers, 33 bronze and four new variants.” —Seth Meyers

“Well, last night was the closing ceremony for the 2020 Tokyo Olympics which, because of Covid, were actually held in 2021, which means it’s only three more years until the 2024 Olympics are postponed to 2027.” —Seth Meyers

“I hope you enjoyed them, because with global warming, even the Winter Olympics will soon be the Summer Olympics.” —David Spade

“Now if you want to witness physical excellence, you’ll have to watch a flight attendant duct tape a drunk guy to his seat.” —Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night 

of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”