I did make my connection (tying the record previously set by me)

An American Airlines passenger was duct taped after hurling racist and homophobic slurs during a midair meltdown. And for anyone wondering, I did make my connection. --Greg Gutfeld 

After decades of no activity, the giant geyser in Yellowstone Park just erupted 200 feet tall for over an hour, tying the record previously set by me when I found my father's Playboy magazine. --Greg Gutfeld 

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

 “A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”