If war's so bad why does it still exist (Unfortunately they’re calling it Hands On Dick’s)

April 2021

President Biden announced executive action to curb gun violence including new regulations against gun kits that you could buy online and assemble at home. Remember how frustrated and angry you get assembling a dresser? Now imagine at the end of that you had a gun. —Colin Jost

Dick’s Sporting Goods is opening a new ‘experiential’ store with a rock climbing wall, sports fields and an indoor wellness space. Unfortunately they’re calling it Hands On Dick’s. —Colin Jost

The house where Lizzie Borden murdered her parents has been sold for $2 Million and is being turned into a bed and breakfast. Though a bed and breakfast where a murder happens is pretty much just a Days Inn. —Colin Jost

The publishers of the Captain Underpants books have canceled a spin-off of the popular series saying it promoted passive racism which is not what I expected a guy called Captain Underpants to get cancelled for. —Colin Jost

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 

A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Captain Underpants has been promoted to Colonel (Hey — baguettes)

On Monday, Donald Trump met with the president of Panama and bragged that the U.S. built the Panama Canal. Trump’s bringing up a project from 100 years ago like he had something to do with it. So I guess if he never builds his border wall, he can always take credit for the one in China. –James Corden

This is basically the only thing Trump knows about Panama. He meets someone from Panama and says, “Hey — canal.” He meets someone from France and says, “Hey — baguettes.” He meets someone from Russia and says, “Hey — thanks for helping me with that whole beating Hillary thing.” –James Corden

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #FeeltheBern @justicedems @BrandNew535

trump's biggest economic success is Barack Obama (Wonder Woman, pt. 1)

Last week, President Trump announced the United States will withdraw from the Paris climate agreement. Trump said he wants the entire country to be the same temperature as a Florida golf course. –Jimmy Fallon

Hillary Clinton’s running mate, Tim Kaine, tweeted that Trump is pulling out of it because he’s jealous of Obama. Then Kaine waited for one of his 25 followers to retweet him. –Jimmy Fallon

“Wonder Woman” made over $100 million at the box office this weekend, and beat “Captain Underpants.” But I think Captain Underpants is in denial — he’s been handing out electoral maps to show the theaters where he won. –Jimmy Fallon

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #Bernie2020 #JusticeDemocrats