curl up with a big book and relive the Bush administration (but, yeah...Russia)

"New Jersey Governor Chris Christie is indignant at the New York Times for its sloppy reporting about the Bridgegate scandal. The governor also took the opportunity to highlight a few other things he believes are sloppy: Meatloaf with gravy, nachos, barbecue ribs, meat-lovers pizza, buffalo wings, hot-fudge sundaes and chili dogs." –David Letterman

"It's a memoir by George W. Bush and because I'm telling you, if there is one thing you really want to do now, if you are like me, and God I pray you're not like me, but if there's one thing you want to do, is get a nice fire going and curl up with a big book and relive the Bush administration." –David Letterman

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

I'll close that bridge when I get to it (The King Collar)

"Tomorrow Chris Christie is expected to unveil his agenda for this year. When asked what he's planning for next year, Christie said, 'I'll close that bridge when I get to it.'" –Jimmy Fallon

A county in Colorado just voted to put taxes from selling marijuana toward supporting college scholarships. And you can tell it's a weed scholarship, because it actually pays for 11 years of college. –Jimmy Fallon

I don’t know if this is such a good idea, but Pizza Hut just unveiled its new "Triple Threat Box," which is a box with three drawers that holds pizza, breadsticks, and a big chocolate chip cookie. Or as Chris Christie calls that, "A wallet.” –Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

I'll close that bridge when I get to it (Does this smell bad to you?)

"Tomorrow Chris Christie is expected to unveil his agenda for this year. When asked what he's planning for next year, Christie said, 'I'll close that bridge when I get to it.'" –Jimmy Fallon

"New Jersey Governor Chris Christie continues to push his agenda. Today he proposed a longer school day for children in his state. In fairness, kids in New Jersey probably need a longer day since their buses spend three hours stuck on a bridge." –Jimmy Fallon

But despite the shutdown, the FDA is trying to restart their inspections of risky foods, though so far it's just one guy going, "Does this smell bad to you? Try it. Drink it." --Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Do you know what his least favorite card game is? (Which way is that?)

"We are learning more and more about New Jersey Governor Chris Christie. Do you know what his least favorite card game is? Bridge!" –Jay Leno

"Thousands of dead fish have now washed up on shore along the coast of South Carolina. Today the NRA said that this wouldn't have happened if those fish had guns." –Jay Leno

"Yesterday after his press conference about the big traffic scandal, Chris Christie traveled to Fort Lee, New Jersey, to personally apologize to the mayor there, but it took longer than he thought. Apparently traffic was a nightmare." –Jay Leno

"Even though Rick Perry came in fifth, he is not quitting. He said it's on to South Carolina. And then today, he said, 'Which way is that?'" –Jay Leno

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Time to party like it's 1939! (Mmmm, peach)

Sources say that Donald Trump is already finalizing his cabinet in case he wins tomorrow. Rudy Giuliani would be attorney general, Newt Gingrich would be secretary of state, and Chris Christie would be the wall. –Jimmy Fallon

"The big news is the midterm elections. Last night Republicans picked up a dozen seats in the House to give them their biggest majority since World War II. Or as they put it, 'Time to party like it's 1939!'" –Jimmy Fallon

"New Jersey’s Chris Christie is still digging himself out of this scandal, Bridgegate. In fact, some experts are now saying he could be impeached. When he heard that Christie said, 'Mmmm, peach." –Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

The only guy who can turn things around for Ukraine (If the pants don't fit, you must acquit)

“Newt Gingrich's campaign is broke. All the money is gone. So now he's charging $50 for a photo. And for $100 you can marry him.” –David Letterman

"Ukraine is in a lot of trouble, and I was thinking about this. The only guy who can turn things around for Ukraine — Phil Jackson." –David Letterman

"Chris Christie, what a guy. He allegedly closes down the George Washington Bridge. Everybody goes crazy. And he says, 'I'll handle this. I'm going to investigate myself.' So he investigates himself. He finds out that he, in fact, is innocent. He came up with a classic defense, 'If the pants don't fit, you must acquit.'" –David Letterman

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.” 

 

It's about keeping those ants in line (they’d make such a cute couple)

"The Dalai Lama was down at the White House today to meet President Obama. Meanwhile in Texas, George W. Bush got caught in the garage door." –David Letterman

“Newt Gingrich is against same-sex marriage. Well, actually, he's against same-marriage sex.” –David Letterman

"Mitt Romney and Rick Santorum are both against gay marriage. Really, against gay marriage? I tell you, the problem with this is they’d make such a cute couple.” –David Letterman

"New Jersey Governor Chris Christie is indignant at the New York Times for its sloppy reporting about the Bridge-Gate scandal. The governor also took the opportunity to highlight a few other things he believes are sloppy: Meatloaf with gravy, nachos, barbecue ribs, meat-lovers pizza, buffalo wings, hot-fudge sundaes and chili dogs." –David Letterman

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/02/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”