Wait, he did? We messed up — come back, hey! We like you! (The Power of the People)

“Joe Biden left New Hampshire before the polls were even closed? I mean, I’ve heard of fans leaving the game early, but you know it’s bad when the team leaves early to beat the traffic.” —Trevor Noah

“Biden’s lackluster performances have been a huge surprise, and now, even Biden’s own people are having a little trouble hiding their anxiety. One unnamed adviser told reporters, ‘I know we’re supposed to say we’re going to win, but I just don’t know. This is horrendous. We’re all scared.’ It’s not great when your campaign sounds like a Civil War letter home: ‘My dearest Jill, we fled New Hampshire after a miserable defeat and have retreated to make our last stand in South Carolina. I thought we could win, but I guess I’m just a lying, dog-faced pony soldier.’” —Stephen Colbert

“Meanwhile, Andrew Yang officially dropped out of the race. Yang supported giving Americans $1,000 a month, reducing student loans and legalizing weed. Americans heard that and were like, ‘Wait, he did? We messed up — come back, hey! We like you!’” —Jimmy Fallon

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 

A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

It's about time the working class won that war (So it’s more like first)

“The New Hampshire primary was last night and according to cable news, here’s what happened: Bernie Sanders won, but not by a lot, so it’s really like third, and Pete Buttigieg was second, but who saw that coming? So it’s more like first. And Amy Klobuchar was third, which is really surprising so it’s also like first, and Joe Biden came in fifth, but was expected to do better, so it’s more like eighth. So I guess the real winner is Andrew Yang, because he dropped out and doesn’t have to deal with this anymore. So, congratulations, Andrew Yang, on winning New Hampshire.” —Seth Meyers

“Bernie Sanders finished first, Pete Buttigieg finished second and Joe Biden is finished.” —Jimmy Fallon

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 

A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

He’s not afraid to say the wrong thing (Well, he has my vote)

“You shouldn’t feel bad about not seeing it, because last night’s Democratic debate was the least-watched Democratic debate yet. Yes, yeah, true story. The ratio was one viewer for every one candidate.” --Conan O’Brien

“Andrew Yang supporters are angry that their candidate didn’t get to talk very much last night. Yeah. And Joe Biden’s supporters are angry that theirs did.” --Conan O’Brien

“Wow, in a two-hour debate, Andrew Yang only got to speak for six minutes and 53 seconds. That’s nothing. Like, there are rappers who speak more before their song even starts.” --Trevor Noah

“Meanwhile, Joe Biden had some pretty big blunders on issues of race and domestic violence — I don’t know if you saw this. Or as Biden’s campaign is calling it, ‘a pretty average night.’” --Jimmy Fallon

“Yeah, Biden also caught heat for saying that he ‘came out of the black community.’ When she heard that, Rachel Dolezal was like, ‘Well, he has my vote.’” --Jimmy Fallon

“Well, that’s the thing about Joe Biden: He’s not afraid to say the wrong thing.” --Jimmy Kimmel

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 

A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

The Hill's Editor-In-Chief: Yang slams NBA and new Biden reporting

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic.

A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

I actually think the opposite of Trump would be... (I would try burning sage or holding a séance)

“Entrepreneur Andrew Yang used his opening statement tonight to differentiate himself from President Trump, saying, ‘The opposite of Donald Trump is an Asian man who likes math,’ which is a great point, but I actually think the opposite of Trump would be a black guy who is a good president.” --Seth Meyers

“O.K., first of all, I don’t think it’s legal to use bleach on an active crime scene. Secondly, you’re definitely, definitely going to need something stronger than Clorox. I would try burning sage or holding a séance. You’re going to need a belt sander to get the ketchup stains off the desk.” --Seth Meyers, on Senator Kirsten Gillibrand’s saying that her first act as president would be to “Clorox the Oval Office”

“Over the last two nights, we’ve watched 20 Democrats arguing. Usually, if you want to see that, you have to walk into a Whole Foods and start criticizing ‘Hamilton.’” --James Corden

“Yeah, Joe Biden, this was an unlucky draw, man. Cory Booker on the one side, Kamala on the other and he’s in the middle. It’s like the world’s most racially charged Oreo. I feel like Joe Biden got on the stage and instinctively tried to lock his car doors.” --Trevor Noah

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

It’s like we’ve been watching a porno for two years, and they’re still ordering the pizza (for a Better Wang!)

A Justice Department official announced that he anticipates that the Mueller Report will go on a little longer. A little longer? We’ve been anticipating a long time.  It’s like we’ve been watching a porno for two years, and they’re still ordering the pizza. --Stephen Colbert

Presidential candidate Andrew Yang has come out against infant circumcision. I can see the yard signs now: “Andrew Yang for a Better Wang!” --Stephen Colbert

A woman in Upstate New York just gave birth to a healthy baby girl that weighs 15 pounds. When you give that baby a bottle, she just unscrews the top and chugs it. The mother said she felt like she was, "hit by two tractor trailers simultaneously." While the baby said, "It was no picnic for me either, Candace." --Jimmy Fallon

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”