you'll be able to see everything, except what the hell your teenage daughter's up to (Sorry. Sorry for that image)

"This morning, John McCain, I don't know if you saw this, he appeared as a guest on 'The View.' Did you see that? Yeah, there was kind of an awkward moment when McCain looked at Barbara Walters, he looked at her up and down and said, 'Man, if I was 20 years younger...' Sorry. Sorry for that image." --Conan O'Brien

"This is weird. A new book that is coming out claims that Osama bin laden is a huge Whitney Houston fan. Experts say that helps explain why bin Laden's latest video repeatedly calls for 'death to Bobby Brown.'" --Conan O'Brien

"Experts say -- this is interesting -- that since Sarah Palin became the vice presidential nominee, there's been an actual spike in the sales of her style of eyeglasses. Gone way up. Yeah. Yeah, with Palin's glasses, you'll be able to see everything, except what the hell your teenage daughter's up to." --Conan O'Brien

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Like when they become president or win the Masters or get an Oscar (the strategic use of beer)

"Congratulations to Barack Obama -- he has won the 2009 Nobel Peace Prize. Apparently, the Nobel committee wanted to recognize the president's fine work in bringing peace to a black professor and a white cop through the strategic use of beer. " --Jay Leno

"Yesterday in Louisiana, a judge denied an interracial couple a marriage license because he felt, I quote, their children would later suffer in life from being interracial. Like when they become president or win the Masters or get an Oscar."  --Jay Leno

"Well, listen to this. Here's some good terrorist gossip. According to a Sudanese novelist who once lived with Osama bin Laden for four months, Osama bin Laden is a huge Whitney Houston fan which is surprising. I mean, considering the way those people treat women, you'd think he'd be a bigger Bobby Brown fan." --Jay Leno

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

So this is how fascism dies (Between a dildo shop and a crematorium)

"A former Navy SEAL has a book out that claims Osama bin Laden was unarmed when he was shot. The book is called 'Who Cares, He's Dead.'" –Conan O'Brien

"This is weird. A new book that is coming out claims that Osama bin laden is a huge Whitney Houston fan. Experts say that helps explain why bin Laden's latest video repeatedly calls for 'death to Bobby Brown.'" --Conan O'Brien

"Next Tuesday -- a lot of people are talking about this -- President Obama plans to make a televised speech to the nation's students during school hours. Many Republicans are planning to keep their kids home from school in protest. As a result, those kids have voted Obama 'Best President Ever.'" --Conan O'Brien

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Congressmen will be less likely to scream out, 'You lie!' if they could get hit with a folding chair (cultural ideas, social theories and gunfire)

"This is weird. A new book that is coming out claims that Osama bin laden is a huge Whitney Houston fan. Experts say that helps explain why bin Laden's latest video repeatedly calls for 'death to Bobby Brown.'" --Conan O'Brien

"This is interesting. China has started an educational exchange program that's sending 23 high school students to schools in Detroit. Once in Detroit, the students will exchange cultural ideas, social theories and gunfire." --Conan O'Brien

"In Connecticut — this is weird — one of the Republican candidates running for Congress is the former CEO of the W.W.E. wrestling organization, which could be good. Congressmen will be less likely to scream out, 'You lie!' if they could get hit with a folding chair." --Conan O'Brien

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”  

On one hand, you have an out-of-control maniac, and on the other hand, there's Osama bin Laden

"A former sex slave of Osama bin Laden now has a book coming out. In the book, she says that Osama bin Laden is in love with Whitney Houston. It would be interesting. On the one hand, you have an out-of-control maniac, and then on the other hand, there's Osama bin Laden." --David Letterman

"As three years have gone by, it's grown harder and harder (for Iraqis) to find the right way to say 'thank you.' Everyone knew before the war that Iraq had huge stockpiles of gratitude [on screen: piles of gifts inside a 'gratitude bunker.']. He [President Bush just wants a little thoughtfulness, that's all. It's not like the president thought that the U.S. would be greeted as liberators or handed flowers. I mean, he's not retarded ... but a note, a gesture. My sources in Washington say the president gets up every day, walks to the mailbox, and asks, 'Any cards?' But always, nothing. There's an Iraqi word for that kind of ingratitude -- 'chutzpuh.' If they don't act fast, Iraqis could lose the 'Battle for American Hearts and Minds.' And if that happens, things over here could turn ugly." --Daily Show correspondent Aasif Mandvi

I don't think al Qaeda has the guts (he's not that fanatical about you)

"According to Kola Boof, 'Whitney Houston was the one name that would be mentioned constantly. She was brainwashed by American culture and her husband, Bobby Brown, whom Osama talked about having killed.' Ladies, there's an important lesson here. If your guy's always talking about killing another woman's husband, it just means he's not that fanatical about you." --Stephen Colbert

"The new season of 'Survivor' is going to be dividing up the tribes by race. They said they got the idea from Karl Rove." --Bill Maher

"The Republicans have a new talking point on Iraq. It's about time they got one. The new one is: 'If we don't fight them there, they'll follow us home.' There's a representative -- a Republican named Curt Weldon -- who said we either fight them over there or we fight them here in our supermarkets. Have you ever been to that Ralph's on Sunset at 3 in the morning? I don't think al Qaeda has the guts." --Bill Maher