all Joe Biden has to do is lay low in South America for the next eight months (Campaign-aganza!)

“Joe Biden’s a front-runner now, but it can’t be a great sign that his number one constituency is people who don’t want to see or hear from Joe Biden. Basically all Joe Biden has to do is lay low in South America for the next eight months — he’ll beat Trump in a landslide.” —James Corden

“Biden did so well, he even captured Elizabeth Warren’s home state of Massachusetts, where he did not appear in person. If I’m Elizabeth Warren right now, that’s the last time I campaign coherently. Next time, it’s just going to be ‘Crazy Aunt Lizzie’s No-Malarkey, Stream-of-Consciousness, Folksy-rific Wooden Nickel in Every Garage Campaign-aganza!’” —Stephen Colbert

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 

A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

You Might Be An A**hole If... (Then he'll never find it)

"The vice president of Iran 'resigned' and that of course is Iranian for shot and thrown out of a car." --David Letterman

"But the governor of South Carolina, Governor Mark Sanford has lately been seen not wearing his wedding ring. And I was thinking, geez, I hope he didn't lose it while he was hiking on the Appalachian Trail. Then he'll never find it." --David Letterman

"President Obama tried to get a fire going under the lawmakers before the August recess, which is when they take a one-month break in order to visit their girlfriends in South America." --Jimmy Kimmel

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Do you think there's any chance in hell Rush Limbaugh could bend over and grab his ankles? (Or you could cover the New York Yankees' payroll for a season and a half)

"Ooh, it's getting nasty now between President Obama and Rush Limbaugh. In fact, Limbaugh told his radio audience he's not going to 'bend over' and grab his ankles just because Barack Obama is black. Well, you know, let's take race out of it for a minute. Now, honestly, regardless of who's president, do you think there's any chance in hell Rush Limbaugh could bend over and grab his ankles?" --Jay Leno

"President Obama says he needs nearly a trillion dollars to help kick start the economy. That's a lot of money. Do you realize with that money, you could give every man and woman and child in this country $3,300? Or you could buy shoes for everyone in South America for life. Or you could cover the New York Yankees' payroll for a season and a half." --Jay Leno

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

The guy ignites more passion down there than the Virgin Mary on a piece of toast (get crazy f**ked up)

"President Bush has spent the last week touring Latin America. He spent the last three days in Mexico, which, as you know, is America's leading supplier of ... Mexicans. He held a joint news conference with Mexican President Felipe Calderon. At one point, Calderon personalized the immigration issue by discussing members of his own family who live in the United States picking vegetables. President Bush countered that members of his family sometimes go to Cancun and get crazy f**ked up." --Jon Stewart

"This week President Bush concluded his eight-day tour of South and Central America, and he was greeted by throngs of rabid admirers. The guy ignites more passion down there than the Virgin Mary on a piece of toast." --Stephen Colbert

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

it was like ordering a Jägerbomb, then getting a Shirley Temple (turn ons)

President Trump was supposed to go to South America today, but he canceled, and Mike Pence went instead. For South America, it was like ordering a Jägerbomb, then getting a Shirley Temple. --Jimmy Fallon

Even though the FBI raided his office, Trump's lawyer said that he would rather jump out of a building than turn on Trump. When Melania heard the words "turn on" and "Trump," she said that she was going to jump out of the building. --Jimmy Fallon

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.