Call it 'Los Elephantes.' (I Want a Parade)

"Scooter Libby received a ludicrous 30 months in prison. 30 months? He only obstructed justice for a couple of hours. Now Scooter, I do have some advice for you when you check into the graybar hotel. The second you arrive, punch the first guy you see, then stand over that sucker and shout, 'You've been scootered.' Next, find Duke Cunningham and start your own prison gang. Call it 'Los Elephantes.' In the next few months, you're going to get a lot more members." --Stephen Colbert

"Vice President Dick Cheney said today the surge policy is working. In fact, gas prices have surged almost $4 a minute." --Jay Leno

"Actor and former Senator Fred Thompson, who left the TV show 'Law & Order,' has yet to announce he's running for president but he's already third in the polls among Republicans. Isn't that amazing? He leaves NBC, and his ratings automatically go up." --Jay Leno

A magisterial collection.

An emotional roller coaster.

Soon to be a cult classic.

A combination of Bukowski’s

Last Night On Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html

A fitting tribute to the most crooked lawmaker ever (the kids immediately became Republicans)

"According to the latest poll, New Hampshire voters -- kind of prickly voters -- are unexpectedly warming to Hillary Clinton. So, this could be the proof of global warming -- Hillary thawing." --Jay Leno

"Hillary Clinton announced this week that she has dropped her plan to give $5,000 to every baby born in America. Apparently what happened was, they did a test where they gave $5,000 to 100 babies, and the kids immediately became Republicans." --Jay Leno

     

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #Bernie2020 #FeeltheBern #repealreplacerepublicans

the governor usually has a prostitute change his clocks (whether it's shaped like Florida)

"Tonight, Hillary Clinton says the states she's won are bigger than Obama's. I say it's not the size that counts but whether it's shaped like Florida." --Stephen Colbert

"New York Post, I call dibs on 'Eliot Mess.' Huge news today. New York Gov. Eliot Spitzer has admitted involvement with a prostitution ring. I just hope the press deals with this tastefully (On screen: Picture of Spitzer, Headline: WHORES!)" --Stephen Colbert

"The governor was supposed to give a press conference today at 2:15 pm but a whole hour passed before he spoke. To be fair, it is Daylight Savings time, and the governor usually has a prostitute change his clocks." --Stephen Colbert

"I want to make one thing perfectly clear, okay folks, Gov. Spitzer is a friend of the show. That never changes. I've sat next to the guy three times and I didn't pick up on any of this, and I usually have excellent Whore-dar." --Stephen Colbert

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #JusticeDemocrats #Bernie2020

And they called Bill Clinton slick (just winded from torturing someone)

"Dick Cheney had another scare. He was taken to the hospital with shortness of breath. He was okay, he was just winded from torturing a detainee." --David Letterman

"Because of the Jack Abramoff and Duke Cunningham bribery scandals, Republicans in Congress are now putting together what they are calling a sweeping lobbying reform package. They think it's such a good idea that they're going to charge companies a million dollars to sponsor it." --Jay Leno

"This Jack Abramoff guy allegedly bribed congressmen on issues ranging from wireless phone service to internet gambling. This guy was really up to date on technology. In fact, before he was indicted, he had a deal going with the home shopping network for people to be able to buy a congressman online." --Jay Leno

I'm sorry (We Got Caught)/a disappointment on opposite sex marriage

Republican congressman "Randy 'Duke' Cunningham sentenced to 8 years in prison. You see, it really is hard out there for a pimp." --Jay Leno

"Madonna is looking to buy a home in Israel, and today the PLO told Israel 'Okay, you can have the land back.'" --Jay Leno

"More problems for Hillary Clinton. The head of New York state's leading gay rights group describes Hillary Clinton as a disappointment on same sex marriage. Today, her husband Bill described her as a disappointment on opposite sex marriage." --Jay Leno