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Friday, February 28, 2020

If at first you don’t succeed, welcome to the Trump administration (Mike, you’re up. You take it)


“I think Trump was trying to spell ‘choker’ but failed to perform the crucial task at the key moment when everything was on the line.” —Stephen Colbert

“He almost got through a whole tweet without a spelling error, but at the last minute, he chocked. He does have a point, though — this is actually what a lot of voters are saying about Elizabeth Warren: She talks the talk, can she chock the chock?” —James Corden

“This is the greatest crisis of Trump’s presidency, and his first response is, ‘Mike, you’re up. You take it.’” —Stephen Colbert

“But the vice president does have experience with outbreaks — specifically, making them worse. Because when he was the governor of Indiana, Pence’s refusal to implement a needle exchange program led to the worst H.I.V. outbreak in the state’s history. But you know what they say: If at first you don’t succeed, welcome to the Trump administration.” —Stephen Colbert

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”


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