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Saturday, January 18, 2020

they’re going to have to take a party bus to the trial (it will be just like flying Southwest)


“Lev Parnas said everyone in Trump’s inner circle knew what was going on. Mike Pence, John Bolton, the attorney general, William Barr — probably even Kanye knew what was going on.” —Jimmy Kimmel

“So many people are involved, they’re going to have to take a party bus to the trial.” —Trevor Noah

“Chief Justice John Roberts and his members of the Senate took an oath to remain completely impartial during the impeachment trial. Yeah, then they all laughed for four hours.” —Conan O’Brien

“The last time this happened, no one had phones. So this time, senators will not be allowed to use their phones during the trial, and they will have to stand when they cast votes, which is a big deal because, well, for a lot of these senators, this will be the first time they’ve ever stood for anything.” —Jimmy Kimmel

“Yep, during the entire trial, senators will have to remain in their seats. And if they’re also refused food and water, it will be just like flying Southwest.” —Jimmy Fallon

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

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