If she's so good, how come I got all these magic beans? (That's My President)

President Trump today touted his achievements in office, saying, quote, "I accomplished the military." Trump knows so little about the military, he doesn't even know how to use it in a sentence. Meyers as Trump, "I accomplished the military. I boom-boomed the nukes. I bang-banged the guns." --Seth Meyers

In an interview this week, a former Trump Organization executive said that House Speaker Nancy Pelosi is a better deal-maker than President Trump. Meyers as Trump, “Oh, yeah? If she's so good, how come I got all these magic beans?" --Seth Meyers

A man in Japan recently claimed to have dated a cockroach for over a year that he named Lisa. The man said, "Lisa really hit it off with his friends and family, especially his aunt. --Seth Meyers

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”