Congratulate me! I didn’t eat nachos off the casket! (Rabbit Season! Duck Season! Fire!)

Still recovering from yesterday’s Oval Office Battle Royale

between Trump, Chuck Schumer and Nancy Pelosi and the

corpse of Mike Pence. He looks fresh. They ice him down

every night. He’s like salmon. Donald Trump is trying to

put a positive spin on Donald Trump’s performance. But

one person’s not buying that: that’s Donald Trump. Because

according to witnesses, Trump “Stormed out of the Oval

Office and threw his briefing papers across the room.” Oh,

No! Now how is he going to read his briefing? Witnesses

say that Trump was mainly frustrated with Chuck Schumer

saying that “His old sparring buddy got the better of him.

Schumer had goaded him into it.” Schumer got Trump but

using Trump's own personal kryptonite: Opening his mouth.

Trump said, “Chuck, you want to shut down the government.”

Then Schumer said, No sir. You want to shut down the

government.” Then Trump said, “Yes I do. Checkmate.”

I have only seen negotiating that good one time before. It

was between Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck. “Rabbit Season!

Duck Season! Rabbit Season! Rabbit Season! Duck Season!”

Fire! --Stephen Colbert

According to administration officials, Trump has been snappish with aides most of the week. Miffed in part by so many ceremonial events not related to him. Aides added that Trump was impatient for the memorials to end, but expressed pride in himself for remaining publicly civil. That’s how far we’ve fallen. We’ve gone from “1,000 points of light” to “Congratulate me! I didn’t eat nachos off the casket!” --Stephen Colbert

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

like the ghost of a retired dentist who drowned in a water hazard on the 18th hole (lost grandpa)

March 2021

“Checked in on Donald Trump’s retirement in Florida, where he has decided to spend his time creepily shuffling around his Palm Beach resort like the ghost of a retired dentist who drowned in a water hazard on the 18th hole.” —Seth Meyers

“In almost all photos since Trump slinked away from the White House, the former president has appeared in a uniform of red hat, white polo and slacks that seem to be rising faster than the sea level. Trump looks like a lost grandpa who’s supposed to be watching the kids at the mall.” —Seth Meyers

“His business and finances are apparently in even worse shape. There are reports that Trump’s net worth fell by $700 Million during his presidency, as well as the intensification of a New York attorney general’s investigation into his tax returns and the partial closure of his Mar-a-Lago resort due to a Covid outbreak. My God, Covid follows this guy like a rain cloud following Daffy Duck. His rallies, the White House, now Mar-a-Lago – he’s like a walking Covid test. If you’re ever in physical proximity to Donald Trump, you should just, you know, quarantine for two weeks just to be safe.” —Seth Meyers

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 

A combination of Bukowski’s The Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

which also happen to be his two favorite ways to meet women (Dr. Trump has made yet another profound linguistic discovery)

“Donald Trump is nothing if not a pioneer of the English language. You might
think he’s just making up words or doesn’t know how to read. But that is not
the case, you see. Trump doesn’t make errors; he makes discoveries —
he’s like a scholar. He spends all night scouring obscure 15th century
medieval texts looking for previously unknown words. [as Trump]
‘Eureka, I’ve found it! ‘Lawmakers.’’ And recently, Dr. Trump has made
yet another profound linguistic discovery.” --Seth Meyers

“‘Foistered.’ And it wasn’t just like a slip of the tongue because he did it again
on Tuesday in Lexington and Friday in Tupelo. He used the word ‘foistered’
three times in a week. It’s a combination of ‘foisted’ and ‘forced,’ which also
happen to be his two favorite ways to meet women.” --Jimmy Kimmel

“That’s right, ‘foistered.’ He sounds like Daffy Duck trying to say faster. [as Daffy Duck]
Foister! Foister! The Democrats are after us!’” --Seth Meyers

“Trump is surrounded — surrounded by so many sycophants that no one was willing to tell him ‘foistered’ is not a word, so he used it twice. Soon, his underlings are going to start using it, too. [as Trump underling] ‘This administration is moving foister and foister than any administration in history, but we’re being stonewalled by Democratic ‘lawmakers.’’” --Seth Meyers

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 

A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

"Rabbit Season! Duck Season! Rabbit Season! Rabbit Season! Duck Season!” Fire! (Yes I do. Checkmate)

Still recovering from yesterday’s Oval Office Battle Royale between Trump, Chuck Schumer and Nancy Pelosi and the corpse of Mike Pence. He looks fresh. They ice him down every night. He’s like salmon. Donald Trump is trying to put a positive spin on Donald Trump’s performance. But one person’s not buying that: that’s Donald Trump. 

Because according to witnesses, Trump “Stormed out of the Oval Office and threw his briefing papers across the room.” Oh, No! Now how is he going to read his briefing? Witnesses say that Trump was mainly frustrated with Chuck Schumer saying that “His old sparring buddy got the better of him. Schumer had goaded him into it.” 

Schumer got Trump but using trump’s own personal kryptonite: Opening his mouth. Trump said, “Chuck, you want to shut down the government.” Then Schumer said, No sir. You want to shut down the government.” Then Trump said, “Yes I do. Checkmate.” 

I have only seen negotiating that good one time before. It was between Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck. “Rabbit Season! Duck Season! Rabbit Season! Rabbit Season! Duck Season!” Fire! --Stephen Colbert

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”