"Thursday is the deadline for Iran to meet a series of measures to delay its nuclear program. Then Iran said, 'Do you mean 'DEADLINE deadline' or 'Sign up for Obamacare deadline?'" –Jimmy Fallon
"The St. Louis Rams made history on Saturday by drafting Michael Sam, making him the first openly gay player in the NFL. Yep, an NFL player who's never been with a woman — or as Tim Tebow put it, 'Eh, it's been done.'" –Jimmy Fallon
"The first openly gay player has been drafted by the NFL. If you saw it on ESPN, Michael Sam celebrated by kissing his boyfriend. This is historic. This is the first time anyone has celebrated being drafted by the St. Louis Rams." –Conan O'Brien
"In Colorado a man was accidentally released from prison 90 years too soon. In a related story, everyone in Colorado is high." –Conan O'Brien
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html
“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth
and Orwell’s 1984.”
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