“That’s right — Cory Booker has announced that he is officially quitting the Democratic presidential race. And, look, you can quit however you want, but I do think it’s weird that his quitting video doesn’t look like he’s quitting. He’s out there with crowds, shaking hands — and everyone does this. My opinion is if you’re going to drop out of the race, your video should look like you dropped out of the race. It should just be you sitting alone on a park bench, or cleaning out your desk. I want it to look depressing!” —Trevor Noah
[Imitating Booker] “We need to stand together, work together, rise together, sit back down together, and quit alone!” —Stephen Colbert
“But, yeah, whatever happens in November, America will not be electing a black president. And you know, Obama must be secretly happy about this. Yeah, he’s probably in Martha's Vineyard like, ‘Ah, that’s right. Ah, first and last, [expletive]! I’m the blackest of all time!’” —Trevor Noah
“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic.
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”
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